Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

5 Bumps

This might sound kinda sick and nosey, but ... after being raped how long did it take you to tell anyone or even go to the police?

I can only imagine how somebody would feel to whom this has happened. And I think I understand the shame and (false) guilt thing and wanting to clean up BUT Things like that are constantly in the media, on internet, the newspaper and tons of people never get busted. People should know "DO NOT WASTE TIME! Or destroy the evidence!" But apparently real life doesn't work like that. Why?


Asked by BeachMom81 at 5:06 PM on Jan. 1, 2011 in Health

Level 21 (11,551 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I went right afterward. I was 14 he was 16. They didn't believe me and told me to go home :( He beat the shit out of me and I was bleeding and bruised and that still wasn't enough. They didn't believe me due to they knew my mother (my mother was famous in he police department) My own family didn't believe me.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 5:12 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • i am so sorry for all these women on here that have been raped and noone believed you. i believe you and i am so sorry that happened to you. i think most rape victims blame themselves and want to just want it to be out of there minds and ofcourse it never happens. the most important thing is to report it immediately and no matter what happens. stand your ground. i never been in that position but i hope more and more women will go to the police. rape is not about sex its about power. they do not have the power .

    Answer by lambdarose at 5:22 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Next morning, but since I was underage the man who raped me was never prosecuted because my parents opted out of a trial without asking me. They didn't really believe that I was raped, even though I was 14 and he was 28.

    Answer by scout_mom at 5:08 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • The stories you've gotten so far are sad but true. I was molested as a child and when I told my mom, I wasn't believed. Many women don't report because a lot of people don't/wont believe them.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 5:18 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • I think they are afraid to report b/c of fear of retaliation, fear of not being believed, fear of being told it is their fault somehow. Fear of embarrassment, fear of the rape kit. There are so many reasons. But, it is so important to report. I dont think the victim has closure until they get it out and talk about it with a trusted person.


    Answer by beyondhopes at 5:12 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • I was raped when I was 13 by my friends brother. I never told my parents to this day. I was afaid to tell my parents because they would call the cops and I went to school with this guy, I didnt want to be known as a snitch, even though he was wrong. Teenagers that age dont care. I was afraid my mom would not let me be friends with that guys sister. I didnt tell her either. I was afraid my parents would judge me, I was afraid I would never be allowed to go anywhere. I didnt want to be looked at as the girl who got raped

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:13 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Never went to the police. The people I told did not believe me. So I did not tell anyone else. So I just got over it. Took me a long time too. Life goes on.

    Answer by louise2 at 5:14 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Unbelievable. I'm speechless.

    Comment by BeachMom81 (original poster) at 5:20 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • I never reported it, I did talk with the District Attorney a year later, but he said what I already knew. It would be his word against mine. Because I was in a relationship with him, he was the father of my son. I tried to live the abusiver relationship that night(my son was at my mothers) and after he beat me up for an hour, he raped me, purely just for the power trip.

    I did tell my university a year later(I had stopped going to school after it happened) and they didn't believe me, but thanks to my wonderful hubby we threatened to sue them for not letting me back in school and they gave in. I am now going into my last semester.

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 5:31 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • If women got more support they may report it but they feel ashamed and sometimes dont want the whole world to know about it. After the admission comes a trial and proof eccedra.

    Answer by Momabear455 at 6:31 PM on Jan. 1, 2011