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After 7 yrs now he wants to love me????!???!???

OK so a little background info. I have been th my DH for 7 yrs. And after a couple yrs, he decided that he didnt love me anymore. But for the kids sake I stayed. We did everything normal, except all that mushy lovey dovy stuff, which I yearned for. Well about 6 months ago I met someone that is insync to the way i feel and what i want in a guy. and dadadadadada...........I am not kidding, I would beg my DH to love me, and I still did alot of things for him take him food to work. Clean, take care of everything so he didnt have to. But this guy treats me like I am so important to him. and loves me for me. i have never felt this way before. I get so oerwhelmed by the way he respects me, loves me, and just us there for me. So I saw that we were getting serious, and I wanted to come clean, bc I needed to make a choice between him and my DH. Well I chose the other guy. My Dh hasnt paid attention to me the past 5 yrs. Nothing, i get not one peeeep from him until now. I tell him everything there is to tell. and that I am in love with someone who loves me. and he starts begging me to give him a chance. and so on. Am I wrong for doing this. or should I give him another chance.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:10 AM on Jan. 2, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • That is a decision that only you can make. If you stayed because of the kids maybe you can stay if you both love each other. You did say he want him to love you...if his love is geniune then go from there. BUT he may be showing you this 'love' all of a sudden because of the other guy. You need to make a decision to break it off with the other guy because you ARE married or leave your husband for this other guy if you feel it can not work and if his emotions towards you are not geniune.

    Answer by KayGia0704 at 8:25 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • 5 years and all the sudden since he sees that you are happy and wanting to move on, he is interested all of the sudden? I say get out while they getting is good! Probably something you should have done long ago instead of staying and turning yourself into your husband's room mate. Not a bash on you at all, it just seems to me that you deserve a lot better. It shouldn't take you being HAPPY for someone to realize they have been a complete dip shit. My guess is that he probably feels no different than he did before he knew about this new man, he is probably just on some kind of high for the competition and controlling part of it all. If I were you, i'd leave. But in the end it's only you who can decide. Best wishes to you. Whatever you choose, I hope you make 2011 YOUR year!

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 8:41 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • I think you shouldn't be seeing another man while you're married, whether it's a loveless marriage or not. Also, I question a man who would date a married woman - if he's okay doing that, does a commitment really mean anything to him?
    I can't tell you whether or not to stay, but I definitely wouldn't leave your husband for a man you're cheating on him with. If you leave, leave for yourself and no one else. If you stay, some counseling would probably help get past some of the issues between the two of you.

    Answer by missanc at 8:56 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • Only you can make this choice, I say follow your heart.

    Answer by Noosa at 1:08 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • You never know what you have... until its gone. Men like what they cant have... I don't know.. I would make him suffer a little while and have fun with the other guy. Make him chase you for a change.

    Answer by sissy0604 at 1:10 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • If I felt he only wanted to love me and wanted me to stay because he didn't want another man to have me then I would not give him another chance.

    Answer by kim0167 at 8:18 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • Just remember, whatever you decide, that a man who will cheat WITH you, will cheat ON you! Obviously, being married doesn't mean much to him. Married is married, no matter what condition your relationship with your spouse is in. Best wishes!

    Answer by etexmom at 1:02 AM on Jan. 3, 2011

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