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Child Support/Custody question

Just a quick question. My son lives with his dad right now and when he went to live there there was no child support ordered. My ex owed money in child support so we decided to do an order of $50 a month to come off the arrears my ex owed. Things have changed, and my ex isnt really taking care of our son and were about to go back to court to get my son back. My ex wont just give him back. We have been getting along except this one issue, and now he wants me to pay him the $50 a month. I am fine with that. In our current order though there is nothing saying how I am supposed to pay but everyone I know says I shouldnt just send him a check every month. I also dont want to get into any trouble with the law you know? Do I go to the child support office and pay them there? Do I just wait and go back to court since our case is being filed for a change in custody? I really am not sure how to go about this.
I normally wouldnt make an issue of custody or support for the record. But my son isnt being taken care of. My husband and I have bought 100% of his clothes. He has multiple tardies. Has been moved once this year and ex told me he plans to move again and far from us. He has also introduced a new gf he met online who I dont get the best vibe from. He had been in a long term relationship before and Im not too keen on him having overnights with random women with my son there. My son was sent to school in my ex husbands shirt once, sent to me with ticks over the summer, and always has dirty socks. I have begged and asked my ex to just give him back but he wont. I already paid our lawyer, but hate family court. I dont want to start more drama then I need to.

What should I do?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:41 AM on Jan. 2, 2011 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I know what you mean about hating family court. I felt like I lived there in the self help center for 3 yrs. The important thing is that you realize nothing is going to be resolved without going before the judge again. Thats just how it works, Educate yourself like I did, learn as much as you can. See if the court has a self help center and find the documents you need to submit to the judge. Child custody is the place to start. Just b/c son is tardy or has dirty socks or dad has different gfs coming in and out doesnt automatically make him an unfit parent in the courts eyes. If you have run out of money to pay an attorney, like I did, go to court and see if they have a program available with attorneys who hold counseling sessions for the public. Ours was on the family court level and you have to get to court super early to assure a spot,,,good luck
    beyondhopes

    Answer by beyondhopes at 10:57 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • sorry your going though this but these are questions you really need to ask your lawyer he would have a better answer for you
    cara124

    Answer by cara124 at 10:48 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • What did your lawyer advise you to do? I'd ask him/her not strangers who are not in your state since state laws vary.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:45 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • If u dont think he is being taken care of there, u should get custody.
    mzQ

    Answer by mzQ at 10:46 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • WOW. WHERE DO I START. FIRST I NEED TO KNOW HOW OLD IS THE CHILD.? THIS MAKES A WORLD OF DIFFERENCE. MY DUAGHTER WAS 17 SO SHE CAME BACK ON HER OWN. BUT IF HE IS 12-THEN THERE IS A PROBLEM. GOP BACK TO FAMILY CRT TO GET SAID CHILD BACK. THE CHILD NEEDS TO SPEAK UP. AFTER CUSTODY ISSUES HAVE BEEN RESOLVED-THEN YOU GO FOR CHILD SUPPORT!!
    auntied222

    Answer by auntied222 at 10:49 AM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • My son is 10, almost 11 and wants to come back. Our court order we were going off of is basically all messed up now because both of us have changed things all around. I have him alot more often then I did at first, and things have just changed dramatically. I do have an appointment with my lawyer Monday morning. I only asked because this is new to me, the paying child support, since we have always just provided everything for my son when he needed it. It was really never an issue (money) and for me still is not. I just want to make sure I do everything the right way since I do plan to go back to court for custody. Thanks everyone for your answers.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:31 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

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