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3 Bumps

Would you date a man who was separated but not divorced?

Why or why not?

S/O of another question.

Answer Question

Asked by scout_mom at 4:17 PM on Jan. 2, 2011 in Relationships

Level 41 (125,190 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • No way. Separated = still married.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 4:22 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • No, I would not, because he is still a married man and there is always the possibility of his reconciliation with his wife.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:22 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • Nope not until the divorce papers are filled....I say this because my mom dated a guy that was seperated and he said they were getting a divorce...3 months later he tells my mom that him and his wife decided to work things out...

    Answer by Shelii at 4:24 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • I think it would depend on a lot of things before I could truly answer this question. One would be why are they separated? If it is because he cheated, then no. Is the separation mutually? If so, then maybe yes. Why have they not divorced yet? Money reasons, okay, sure. Are they still working on their marriage and this is a trial separation, then no. My sister is dating a man who is married but separated. They have been separated for about a year now, but they just can't afford the divorce. In all honestythough, I don't foresee myself for one, ever leaving my husband and two, if that does happen, date a married but separated man. He would have to be someone pretty special and fall into one of the yes/maybe categories that I listed above.


    Answer by JeremysMom at 4:24 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • No. Why he didn't get a divorce? He still has a wife. He still has a family. And maybe he still wants to make it up with them. And I really don't want to step into a family's life and be a maid where I could be a queen (I mean I would choose a guy where I can be the wife, mummy, etc. and not the stinky third other who steal daddy.) Yuck.

    Answer by adriennfaklya at 4:24 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • I woud want to know the ties are COMPLETELY broken!

    Answer by rebeccadac at 4:24 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • Hell no. There are so many reasons why not. I find it tacky. He might just be out cheating on his wife and saying he is seperated. Or he really is sperated and has a good time but realizes he still wants to be with his wife then dumps the girlfriend and breaks her heart when he goes back home. Just a situation to be avoided all the way around.

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 4:26 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • Depends on my life at the time and what type of relationship I wanted. If I did not want a serious relationship, I might.

    But if I was looking for a serious relationship/marriage no I would not.


    Answer by louise2 at 4:27 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • It depends on how much I liked him and if he was considering divorce or just taking a break. Separated means not together so it's a lot different than if he were living with his wife. Of course these guys who say that they are separated but still living with the wife, I might question that.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:29 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

  • Most likely not.

    There would be far to many possible/potential issues in that sort of relationship that I would not want to deal with or have in my life.. Issues like:
    * Still having feelings for the spouse.
    * Still feeling attatched and obligated to the spouse.
    * The spouses could be working on reconciling and one is just playing around during that time.
    *The possibility that divorce never happens.
    * The separated spouse dealing with feelings of hurt, resentment, even loneliness. Also dealing with these same feelings in regards to the wife as well, not just the man I would be dating.
    **The separated spouse missing their children.
    * The potential affects our relationship could have on the divorce proceedings.
    * Dealing with the stress, anger..etc.. that could be potentially coming out due to the divorce.
    If I can come up with these things,while just sitting here and typing. The potential issues list is to big for me to

    Answer by pixie_trix at 4:33 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

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