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6 Bumps

How would you handle?****update***

Step-daughter (20) has gotten married to a man that already has a daughter (6), she already had a son (5). The problem is that I have noticed that she has been spending less and less time with her son..He actually is spending alot of time in his room, alone..When the daughter visits her son gets pushed to the couch while the daughter takes his room. I have now been told that she is trying to get pregnant..So where will this leave him now? She has never spanked him prior to this relationship, now he gets spanked and put on punishment for days on end, longest so far 2wks..My DH says we cant tell her how to raise her child nor should we be involved in her household...However this is a child that I helped her raise for the from age 3mths - 4yrs..She was living with her mother and got pregnant @ 14, came to live with us once the baby was born...I have noticed that since she moved out he is not the same happy child he used to be...She and I are not very close. Any advise would help...Im worried about him

 

*****DH has decided if he does not like what he hears after he speaks with her, that he inform her he  will file for custody*************

 
sam223

Asked by sam223 at 7:17 PM on Jan. 4, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 17 (4,043 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • I have five generations with this problem, I'll tell you what it is. 1) instead of boding with the boy, you guys did. 2) Feeling she needed to show her husband she's a mom, she took him with her. She sees him as a brother, not a son. When she lived with you she had fun playing with him, because he was mainly cared for by others. Now she doesn't want him. If he continues to say with them, he will be abused, or is already. He needs to be removed. Pray that she will love him enough to let him live elsewhere. Otherwise, you may have a dead kid on your hands from depression and abandonment. I know. I started at 10yrs old. My niece @ 13yrs; My niece's son started at 12yrs old. My mother started at 16yrs. God has kept us alive for which today I can say I'm thankful. I became a ward of the court at 14. Plz be there 4 him. Ask her if he can spend the nights when the daughter has his room, etc. Plz love on him & be there 4 him. PLZ!
    WalknWithGod

    Answer by WalknWithGod at 10:45 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • I would talk to her about it maybe she doesnt notice the change or is choosing to ignore it sometimes it helps to see someone elses point of view
    Marie_07

    Answer by Marie_07 at 7:20 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • I would diffidently talk to her.... that is so sad
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 7:19 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • i would deffinetly talk to her or like someone else said talk to her mother if you can that is very sad and it will probably get worse if she conceves and has a new baby he needs the help now
    BGBsmom

    Answer by BGBsmom at 7:25 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • Talk to HER mother as a concerned parent, maybe she can get through to her.
    cerealmom2

    Answer by cerealmom2 at 7:21 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • Maybe a book about step-parenting and blending families might be welcomed. Perhaps offer to spend more time with the child or refer to the Big Brothers Big Sisters program.
    tortkey

    Answer by tortkey at 7:22 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • talk to her@
    Roadfamily6now

    Answer by Roadfamily6now at 8:57 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • aww that poor child, if u can talk to her explain things she may not see it but a 3rd person would
    BrookesMommy824

    Answer by BrookesMommy824 at 10:32 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • Yeah its real sad he used to be such a happy young boy....She notices heck for Christmas that brought each other several gifts, he only got two toys (playdoh and legos)...Cant talk to the mother, she is the reason her kids went thru some much, choose a man over her children (not to mention he messed with one of the kids) and still is with her...
    sam223

    Comment by sam223 (original poster) at 7:26 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • Please talk to Children Services and see what they recommend. If he is a Pedophilia, he needs to be out of that place. The damage being used by them last for a life time. I know it happened to me by by brother's best friend who was our babysitter for 7yrs! I know you love him. Love him enough to see that someone steps in and gets that man out!!!! PLEASE HELP THEM. PLEASE SAVE THEM PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. All my relatives knew what my mother did to me. But not one would step in. I have physical scars and emotional ones as well. Why won't anyone step in?


    slap

    WalknWithGod

    Answer by WalknWithGod at 10:54 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

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