Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Deadbeat Dads

My SF andI been apart for a year now. In that time he hasn't given me a dime. He has only seen his son twice , once a week after we spilt when he came to get the last of his stuff. Than agian a few months later I brought DS to him (a 300 mile around trip). At that time he told me he was working under the table just so he could help out his new girlfriend. I could use CS but we are doing ok. (my boyfriend now helps out and loves DS like his own) I have been thinking alot about having him sign off his rights and letting him off the hook for and CS. I scared if something happened to me ( i Died) he could take my son. He is the father after all. My son doesnt even know him now he's only 2 1/2. SF also didnt send anything for christmas and only sent a 5 day late text for his birthday. What do you ladies think. Plus he was a piss poor father when he was around and owes me 10k for paying his bills when we were together. (i know ill never see it). I dont want to keep him for DS if he ever choices to be apart of his life. I just dont think he deserves to have rights to him. I really dont know what i'm going to do. Dont know if it matters or not but we have moved from east coast (where SF is) to the west coast.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:53 PM on Jan. 4, 2011 in General Parenting

Answers (9)
  • I would file for child support & gain full custody my situation is similar to this & after lots of back and fourth i decided child support was the best option & gaining full custody
    Marie_07

    Answer by Marie_07 at 7:56 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • I have been wanting to do the same thing but when i talked to a lawyer she said it would cost $2,500.
    L0vingMy3Girls

    Answer by L0vingMy3Girls at 7:56 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • i agree with Marie on this one. Its the only way to go. GL
    mekarevell

    Answer by mekarevell at 8:00 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • definately , at least file for full custody, sounds like he would not fight it. LIve your life. He is the parent and should seek his son out. when your son gets older and wants to see him, don't stop him. try not to talk bad about him in front of him. but live your life , your situation seems pretty good no interference from a dumb ass.
    nonni2

    Answer by nonni2 at 8:27 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • sorry, bump for you
    Roadfamily6now

    Answer by Roadfamily6now at 8:58 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • i would just forget about this guy.. let your newboyfriend be his father....if his real dad decideds to show up them just let him see his son.. and he will see by the way his son acts around him and thid other guy.. he will regrete not being there.. i wont keep waiting for this lazy dad to come around...
    niftymisty

    Answer by niftymisty at 1:05 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • I would file for full custody get him to pay all the court documents and try and get him to text you that he is working under the table so you can show the judge if he trys to lie although you wont see that 10k you will see a happier you and a happier son :) good luck :) take him for everything he has
    premiemom18

    Answer by premiemom18 at 2:41 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • I am 21 years old, and do not know my father. Only pictures i've ever seen of him is from his mugshots in Jail and prison. Take it from me, although he doesn't deserve rights to him, ur SON deserves to have a dad, and i'm talking about his REAL biological dad. I know it's not right, and not fair to ur baby daddy, but one day he might really decide to man up and be there for his son, and which ur son deserves that, it's NEVER too late, trust me on that one. I thought it was too late to have any part of my dad at 15 when I recieved a letter, but now that i'm 21, i'm desperate in finding him (which he's in FL and im in VA!) Anyways......I would just live your life as you prob. are, and if ur new BF wants to be a father figure, then what's that going to hurt, I wouldn't allow him to cal him dad, because as u know, nothing last forever. he might just leave one day...then ur son is left w/ nothing but u. goodluck mama!
    knicole0708

    Answer by knicole0708 at 3:51 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Im sorry you are going through this
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 4:29 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN