Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Divorce?

Would you leave your husband if he wouldn't do anything/everything to help you have a child? My husband knew that I wanted to have another child when we got married but now he seems to be changing his tune. He said he'd do it if it happened naturally well we've been trying to 3 years and just started seeing the fertility specialist...we are both OK but can't get pg. Doctor suggested insemination but he won't do it......do I give up my dream of having another baby. I had a miscarriage in March and have been going crazy over not being able to get pg!!! What to do???

Answer Question
 
RociB

Asked by RociB at 10:06 PM on Jan. 4, 2011 in Relationships

Level 2 (10 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Have you tried taking fertility pills without his knowledge?
    idaspida

    Answer by idaspida at 10:09 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • You don't leave your husband over it. It is through better or worse. You are having a hard time right now. Probably on different pages, men have much different views on assistance to conceive. Give him some time. Seek counseling. Come to common grounds. Talk about adoption or other options. Don't give up so easily.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 10:11 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • He said he'd do it if it happened naturally

    He is living up to his part of the bargin. Insemination is not natural...it is medically invasive. Where was he lying? I wouldn't divorce him since he did what he said he would do.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:12 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • Like what kind of fertility pills?
    I've tried talking to him about adoption and he doesn't want anything to do with that either. He's older than I am by 9 years and has two kids. I have one. This is our 2nd marriage.
    RociB

    Comment by RociB (original poster) at 10:13 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • No, I wouldn't leave my husband. It sounds like he's been willing to have a child but he's drawn a line at how far he'll go. Maybe it's becoming too stressful. Maybe you should take a break from it for awhile and re-visit it at another time.

    And I disagree with the pp who suggested taking fertility meds behind his back.
    MrsMWF

    Answer by MrsMWF at 10:13 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • I'm assuming from the way you stated the question that you already have at least one child. Is it worth losing your husband just to have another? If yes, then by all means, divorce him. But make sure the next guy knows. And if no, then you might have to let go of that dream.

    And I would NEVER do anything as important as fertility without my husband's knowledge. I think that's just the foundation for ruining a relationship.
    blu_canary

    Answer by blu_canary at 10:13 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • I dont think that is any reason to get a divorce.
    rach_mommyof2

    Answer by rach_mommyof2 at 10:14 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • maybe try less relax. my dh and i decided to have one after we got married we tried for a while and be dissapointed. as soon as we thought if it happens it happens if it dosent wasent ment to be..we relaxed stoped doing it every day and low and behold..our son is now 5 yrs. my friend was the same way try try try..nothing she calmed down relaxed her dd is gonna be 1 soon. i wouldnt go behind his back thats betrayl how would u feel if u found out he had a vacestimy behind ur back u would be hurt mad upset there would be proublms its kinda the samething. it could cause a divirce. try cutting out soda caffeen sugars. exersize more healthyer u are beter chances u have. good luck just relax..sorry about my spelling my sleepy pill is kicking in thank god lol night mama and best of luck. xo
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 10:59 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • maybe there's something in the back of his mind he's not telling you
    soraya14

    Answer by soraya14 at 11:11 PM on Jan. 4, 2011

  • Like what? I get the feeling sometimes that he doesn't want to have a child anymore.
    RociB

    Comment by RociB (original poster) at 11:28 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN