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I think it isn't oldfasioned to be strict at times with teens ..... do you?

We have our rules and I do'n't look at what other parents do or teens want/do. My teen is 15 and is not allowed out after 22.00 during schooldays. She's got get togethers with friends till only 00.00 on a Friday night or Saturday night. No booze when she is there (only 1 at special occasion!), no smoking, no booze if not all are allowed to have it (AGE WISE!). Etc etc ..... how do you feel about that? She thinks we're too strict sometimes, but guess what ...... her friends think we're the coolest, strictest parents ever!

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patricia67

Asked by patricia67 at 5:59 AM on Jan. 5, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 6 (120 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • I think being more strict is EXACTLY what more parents should be doing. It seems that alot of parents decided there was a better way to raise children, such as involving children in family decisions, having choices, deciding what their punishments should be (if any) and although those are nice ideas and I can see how to some degree they are good it is like it is out of control. Parents want to be "cool" and liked by their kids. And how I can see all of the above playing a part in raising kids PARENTS still need to make the decision. I listened to my child and let her know that I cared about her feelings but I still made the best decisions for her/family. Here are two examples - when dd was younger I wanted to buy a different house dd didn't want to but it was the best decision for us so I did. SIL was looking for a house and didn't buy one until ds approved it. DH would give his dd "choices" yet she would say no to all and he
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • I think they're actually quite fair rules!
    leah_rai

    Answer by leah_rai at 6:16 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • I had to ask to go to the mailbox growing up and it was at the edge of the yard-no joke. There is a thing as going overboard but I don't see it happening nowadays for the most part. If anything parents are way to lax.
    SweetLoveofMine

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 6:16 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • cont.

    would give choices until she liked one. this is what I see alot of people doing they have gone to such extreme with wanting their kids to be "happy" they have forgotten that they are supposed to be parenting
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:17 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Parents like to use the whole"I'm too busy working" excuse so they don't have to parent. They don't realize no matter what your job is, your children are your 1st priority. No one else is going to parent them if you don't.
    SweetLoveofMine

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 6:23 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Teenagers need rules and discipline, I think that solid rules (like yours), and appropriate consequences are what they need. It's a parents job!
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 7:04 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • My 17-year old is allowed to be out until 11 on Fridays or Saturdays only; the rest of the week he's home no later than 9 (unless he's working). Even with my imposed curfews, that doesn't mean he's allowed to be out EVERY night. School and family are the priority. Yes, he sometimes thinks we're too strict but we have always been and he understands the boundaries we've set; it's not really a big deal. Keep up the good work; it's better to be strict (don't go overboard cuz that can backfire too) than lax.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:36 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • I don't think teens should just be allowed to be out. I know I wasn't and I thank my parents for that. I didn't have a curfew because I wasn't allowed out unless they talked to the other teens parents. There was no hanging out at the mall or such for me. My kids will be the same.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 7:51 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • 10 pm on weeknights and 12 on weekends, that is VERY fair, not stricked at all. I am 22, so it wasn't that long ago I was her age and IF I was allowed to go out on a school night, I would have to be home like 9 at the latest and weekends were like 11 at the latest BUT usually I didnt' even do that
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 8:46 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • That doesn't sound strict, that sounds like the rules for my kids.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 9:27 AM on Jan. 5, 2011

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