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How to get daughter out of her "mommy" phase????

My daughter is 13 months old. She is my shadow. After I had her, both my husband and I were working, and she saw a sitter but only for an hour or two from the time he dropped her off, until I picked her up. Always fine with everyone. Eventually I went back to school, and she would see a sitter for a few hours maybe 3 days a week tops. Otherwise she would be home with me (since I wasn't working when I went to school). She was about ten months old then and thats when she started to cling to me. She would be fine when i'd leave her with the babysitter or would cry for like a minute or two and be ok. She's the same with her grandparents. When we are at home, just me and her and her dad, she flips. She will play with him and stuff when we are not at home, but when we are at home she freaks out. I take a shower and she has to try to climb in the tub with arms raised up for me to pick her up or if I take out the trash she is right at the door. If she wakes up at night or in the morning, she will flip if its not me getting her. She screams and cries till her face gets red and shakes. She's even taken things and thrown them in a fit. She'll sometimes get mad enough to lay on the ground. She will go to the door she thinks I went through (or saw me go through) and pound on it and try to open it. She doesn't stop after a few minutes, it goes on for almost an hour (I left once to the grocery store, thats how we learned that one). He feels like she hates him, and I would like some time to do normal stuff (like shower and grocery shop alone). Just letting her cry doesn't seem to work (everyone keeps telling me to do this). Its been over 3 months now and I don't know what else to do.

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Asked by autumnstar68 at 3:40 PM on Jan. 5, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 4 (32 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Enjoy it while you can because they grow up fast. Sooner than you think she'll be in her "anti-mommy" phase and you'll miss this phase.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 3:42 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Stupid question but did something happen at the sitters? Or is there the possibility that it did?

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • My daughter is 16 months old and the same way!! I let her cry it out and have my DD try and comfort her. I also lock the bathroom door so she can not get in. Hope this helps!! It is a tough situation!!

    Answer by 2prettylittle1s at 3:43 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Mom, enjoy this status right now, it won't be long before you will be an embarrassment we all get there at some point. Enjoy her now!

    Answer by older at 3:45 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • She just loves you mommy and wants to be with you always. My girls are the same way. It doesn't matter if I am doing dishes or going pee...they want to be with me all the time and are curious with what ever I might be doing. Sounds like you need some "me" time. As far as your husband goes, she doesn't hate him. Maybe with you going alone places she will have to learn that its ok to be here with daddy. He works right? She doesn't see him as much as she sees you and that could be why she only clings to you. Have him keep attempting to be more involved. She loves him too, but just seems to be a mommys girl.

    Answer by amber1330 at 3:46 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Nothing that I know of happened at the sitters, she always loves going there. And yes, my husband works a lot, so he isn't home as much but he does try to play with her and all that. I really love the attention, don't get me wrong! I just want to be able to pee alone lol.

    Comment by autumnstar68 (original poster) at 3:53 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Mom, you will be able to pee all alone in no time, hang in there and make the best of it.

    Answer by older at 4:06 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Enjoy it. My daughter used to be like that. Now the only person she wants is Daddy, and I feel abandoned.

    Answer by other_mother at 6:11 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Talked to our doctor and he said a lot of the same things. Just to enjoy it for now. And for dad to just let her cry and scream. He said most kids start this around 9-12 months old and it takes them 4-6 months to get over it on average. So I guess i'm going to enjoy the attention while I have it :)

    Comment by autumnstar68 (original poster) at 7:49 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

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