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How do I get an abusive ex-boyfriend to pay me child support? But I dont want him anywhere near me or my child?

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Clarisa18

Asked by Clarisa18 at 4:49 PM on Jan. 5, 2011 in Money & Work

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • I think that needs to be worked out through a lawyer. Child support typically entitles the person to have visitation. With the assistance of a lawyer you could make those visits supervised if he insisted on having them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:51 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Get court order child support, he'll need to take a DNA test, if he refuses he will go to jail. Once DNA comes back he's the daddy. He'll have a set amount to pay every month that goes off of his income. Just because he pays child support doesn't mean you have to let him see his child. He will have to take you to court for visitation rights. What state do you live in and I can give you the link to who you can contact for state ordered child support.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:52 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Child support and visitation are 2 separate issues. Depending on the situation, the court can deny visits but he would still need to pay support.
    MrsMWF

    Answer by MrsMWF at 4:53 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • You dont need a lawyer unless he fights for visitation. No lawyer was involved when my husband found out about my stepson and he did a DNA test and got court ordered child support
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:53 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • child support and visitation actually go hand in hand. A man is not supposed to pay for a child he has no rights to, in that case you ask him to sign over rights and be done with it. If he pays child support you are handing him rights to your child, point blank. So if he wants visits he will get them. If you have some fears they may start with supervised weekend visits, an hour or so, and then increase as he shows he is trustworthy.
    DomoniqueWS

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 4:58 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • I guess it depends on the state. Here all issues are taken care of in one session. Child support and visitation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:59 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • child supprt does not mean visitation
    but once he has money comingout of his check, he may feel like he now wants to see child (to get his money worth?) also if he gets some time-it can lower his payments
    if you have ANY proof of abuse-use it, police report would be great
    if you are prro enough for food stamps and other state services, the state will want to find him for child support, but then you have oened a can of worms, once he gets notice to pay for child, he may want to see child
    if unmarried , in 48 of 50 states, the father has to file for his rights = this is only if you were never married to the father (do not know which two states this is not true)
    good luck!
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 5:00 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • why does poor anon keep getting voted down? lol
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 5:02 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • But hey you may luck out and he may not want to have visits, bonus for everyone. But if he pays and he wants to see he can see the child, even if he has abused you, in the courts eyes that does not mean he will abuse the child. I went thru this with my mom and dad, my dad was abusive to my mom, my mom was abusive to me, but my dad wasn't. He was allowed half and half but he drowned himself in his alcoholism and well, I don't speak to him.
    DomoniqueWS

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 5:04 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • If you want child support, he should have visitation.
    Mom2Just1

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 5:10 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

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