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18 year old not motivated at all!

I posted on here a while back that my 18 ds moved out because of conflicts with his dad (my husband). So he has survived a month, is working part time, but basically does nothing else. Sleeps till 1 or 2, has absolutely no motivation. I know this is the million dollar question, but how do you motivate a teenager??? I hate to see him like this. He is very smart and should be doing more with his life, he appears to be a computer junkie, partier. I know part of it is because he has very little money, so why doesn't he look for another job? Oh this kid worries that crap out of me.

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Asked by njt320 at 6:06 PM on Nov. 11, 2008 in Adult Children (18+)

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Answers (6)
  • Calm down mom. If he's living on his own and supporting himself, you have to let him learn things the hard way, unfortunately. The main thing is to not let him move back in when he fails. He has to experience some hard knocks to push him into finding a full time job. Good luck. Stay strong!

    Answer by pupmom at 6:22 PM on Nov. 11, 2008

  • One thing is to offer to do community service together. And offer to put up part of the money to send them to trade school or college but don't give them the money give it to the school directly. if all else fails get them to enlist.

    Answer by Theoneandonly at 6:59 PM on Nov. 11, 2008

  • I cannot get him to do anything, period.

    Answer by njt320 at 12:38 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • He's gotta figure it out on his own.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:08 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • Sometimes we have to let them hit rock bottom so they can bounce back up. Don't be there financially for him, but be there emotionally.

    Answer by Kat122 at 5:08 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • When my son was 19 he moved out and in with friends. They were into some bad stuff. My son was very into computer games too. He finally had enough of his friends wild partying and came back home. But only for a short while. I forced him into getting a job by cutting off his internet and the satelite when he lived with me. I also stopped buying any grocerys except romain noodles, soup etc. Finally he got tired of eating those things and wanted his internet back,tv and food. But when he got his internet back he got on there and met a woman in Texas. He moved there and they seem to be very happy and have beautiful kids. The only thing I cant stand is it is 1100 miles away.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

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