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I'm a full time working mommy(8-5pm)

The problem is my one year old son wants to be with me all the time.during evening when I go back home he wants to be carried all the time.On off days I manage to do my house hold chores by either making him sleep or making him sit beside me.He doesn't go to anyone else in the house.The situation has become worse as I had a week off.Now he cries when I go to work and never lets his grandma do any work except carrying him. Its really becoming a big trouble for me as now he doesn't bear even a moments separation from me. I can't even go to refreshen myself wiythout letting him cry.how should I deal with the situation

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A11

Asked by A11 at 10:53 PM on Jan. 5, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 17 (3,687 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • let him cry if you cant be there or arent able to hold him. of course try and make one on one time with him and just you but you also have to work and get stuff done at home. my dd does the same thing, i work from 12-830 pm and her dad takes her to her aunts at 7 am so i barely have anytime to see her :( when im at home, and have a few hrs to spend w/her before she goes to bed, i play with her and spend time with her.... do activities (short ones cause its late) and ill clean on the weekends. it can wait for me, but if you need toget it done, then get cleaning etc done. but try & make that 1 on 1 timejust u and him. and dont feel bad, u have to work to make income for him too :D
    MomNbabyGirl009

    Answer by MomNbabyGirl009 at 10:58 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Sit down and explain to him that mommy has to go to work. Give him something of yours, such as a t-shirt that smells of your perfume to carry when you are gone. As for when you are home, tell him you will have mommy-son time AFTER you get your mommy chores done. It is gonna break your heart, but at this age, cry it out is going to be your best answer.
    MomX3LJC

    Answer by MomX3LJC at 11:12 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • sometimes he becomes so audacious.yesterday I slapped him(lightly for sure) as he was not calming down and was crying continuously .I really feel bad but I just didn't know how to deal with this growing pressure. I really feel that I'm a bad mommy
    A11

    Comment by A11 (original poster) at 11:17 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • It's common at that age for them to want you all the time. I'm not sure what you can do, other than wait for the phase to pass. Just give him as much love and attention as you can when you're with him. My guess is that it'll get easier as he gets older and he realizes that there's a schedule to the day, where you leave and come back around a certain time.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 11:17 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • Well, whatever you do, I wouldn't slap him (lightly or not). What he's doing is pretty normal. Babies want their moms. He shouldn't be punished for that. If he's crying, it's very unlikely that a slap will help. He can probably feel your stress and frustration, so the best thing to do is remain calm. My son was also VERY clingy at that age, but at 15 months, he's started to calm down on it a bit. But still, there's are times, especially when he's not feeling good or is teething, that he wants to be in my arm every second.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 11:26 PM on Jan. 5, 2011

  • It might just be a phase. My son would do that for a couple weeks. When I had to do something like fold laundry I would put him in his crib or pack -n -play and talk to him reassuring him I am right there, but can't hold him. I listened to a lot of screaming, but he got over it.
    sunshine58103

    Answer by sunshine58103 at 12:17 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • stop picking him up all the time. he will get eventually.
    mama2bof2

    Answer by mama2bof2 at 7:19 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • Your not a bad mom, you got on cm for help and putting into words what is going on. It is healthy to share experiences and demanding perfection all the time causes a lot of stress. When he starts to whimper the reaction is to find a solution to not get him to a full out cry and it is such a time consuming task to reassure. If you find yourself getting upset put a movie on or redirect your attention for a minute and get your focus back on track with a more pleasing approach for the both of you. Give him instruction on how to do something and share your time with him. Get him involved if you are working on something. You are a fun loving mom with a little man to raise and he sees that perfect person that he needs all the time. Remember that play is fun. Enjoy some play time and be a kid with him. Give him rewards when he is playing while you work. Work is a scheduled task and your little one is a gift from god.

    sexyfancyface

    Answer by sexyfancyface at 8:41 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • ask dr.
    lmt_mom2010

    Answer by lmt_mom2010 at 3:50 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • He's QUITE normal. The doctor will tell you to pick him up! It's fine to do that. He's just needing reassurance, and if he can't get it from you, who can he get it from? You're not a bad mom, you're just expecting more than he's ready for and that's not unusual either.

    When you get home, take care of urgent business like your bladder. Then spend some time with him. If your home's layout allows it, pop him in a safe seat where he can see you and talk to him as you do things like cooking, and make sure to keep popping by to give him a kiss or perhaps a little snack to nibble on. When you're between things, pick him up for a cuddle. The more you GIVE, the less he will demand. The more you resist, the MORE he will demand. That's human nature.

    THIS WILL PASS.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 4:53 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

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