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I shouldn't freak out....right??

Long story short, my SO has a crazy ex girlfriend who is still madly in love with ihm, and not afraid of sharing that (she's sent him emails, he doesn't respond). Out of the blue they had some contact a few months ago, because we got something in the mail with her name on it. I saw the emails they sent, no biggie. He promised me that he has no feelings and even though she does- she means nothing to him. It was a big issue for a while but I finally got over my insecurities and it's been months since her name has even been mentioned...THEN he just got a call tonight from a number- and then a voicemail, and I'm pretty sure it's her (recognize the number from an email, or at least the first 4 or 5 digits-it's from southern cali and we live in northern cali)...

So i probably sound somewhat paranoid- and obviously I want to know if it's her, but there's no real way without me just asking- and I promised that I would never bring her up should I just chill and wait until there is, if there ever is, something to actually worry about?? guess this is more of a vent but any advice would be great :)

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:13 AM on Jan. 6, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • You can't just ask..... Who was that?

    I personally would never have agreed to never bring up a girls name who admits she is madly in love with my SO and then my SO is in contact with this person..... yeah so not ok. He should respect you enough to have no contact with her at all!

    Answer by Charis76 at 1:40 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • i would be ready to whoop some ass incase lol but there is always that bad feeling when the X is around yikes!

    Answer by vall11 at 1:40 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • Have you tried actually talking to him? Talking and communicating actually work.

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:29 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • How come you just cant ask, who was that?

    Answer by augest1 at 3:04 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • Promising never to bring her up again is different than asking if it were her on the telephone. If there is an immediate action (like the phone ringing with her number), you are not breaking your promise.

    Answer by Scuba at 7:57 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • Okay so maybe I didn't explain it properly- but we HAVE talked about and discussed her and he is not in continual communication with her at all (that goes to Charis76 and Tam)- I agreed not to bring up her name since after several talks at different times, it's clear that I was more concerned about nothing. Yes, she sends him emails once in a while to tell him she still loves him- but he doesn't respond to those. Anyway- I DID ask, and turns out it wasn't her, but her sister(who wants to just "catch up")!! At least I know I'm not crazy- so then came up yet another discussion about her but I also yet again realized nothing is there and I need to just chill out. Thanks for the advice...

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:53 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

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