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Honor your Mother & Father

In the bible it states to honor our Mother and Father. Here lately I have been thinking a lot about the way I was treated (mostly by my Father) ignored, he had a new wife and new life when I was growing up. I loved my Mom with all of my heart but she didn't do much for my self esteem. Sadly they have both passed away and here I am years later thinking about all of the things I was put through unnecessarily..I have no idea why these feelings are starting to surface. How can you honor a parent who wasn't there for you or who degraded you?


Asked by tracylyn245 at 1:17 AM on Jan. 6, 2011 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 19 (7,253 Credits)
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Answers (20)
  • I had a stepfather that I loved far more than I EVER loved my natural father, who abandoned us when I was about eight and never returned. I adored my mother who struggled to raise 5 kids on her own. Even in the biblical equation, in order to be honored parents must do THEIR part. They have obligations to their children that they must meet. That god expects them to meet. If they don't they are only sperm and egg donors--not parents.

    Answer by witchqueen at 11:44 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • Try focusing on what they did get right.

    At bare minimum, you'll have a) you were born, and b) you've learned a lot of things NOT to do as a parent.

    Since they have passed on, they cannot cause you any more pain now.

    Answer by anng.atlanta at 1:28 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I don't honor my parents, they were alcoholics, physically & verbally abusive! What's to honor. It takes a hell of alot more to raise, love & respect your child than just being an egg and sperm donor, which is all my parents were!

    Answer by Kathy675 at 1:22 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • You honor them yes in your words and thoughts by what you say and don't say. Parents are not prefect and some are well really bad at it. It is completely natural to deal with your feelings regarding them especially if there was neglect, abuse or abandonment involved. However it's in how you handle those emotions that you honor them. Do you bad mouth them or just state the facts when someone specifically asks you about your childhood? Sometimes the first issue before honoring is forgiving and that is the more difficult issue to deal with. I firmly believe you can honor your parent while still realizing that their actions and opinions are not correct. It's so difficult to summarize here -just complex- but I think this is the start. Good luck.

    Answer by mrs.red08 at 7:46 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I have wondered the same things OP and all I can say is it is very difficult.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:24 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • You are only supposed to honor your parents as long as they do their job, have done right, and their best by you. Just like any other authority.

    Answer by BUTTERCUP777 at 2:24 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • What is honor to have something to give dedication, time, money, love, something that they showed you.>>?
    Was anything shown to you?
    What was their motive for hating you or mirroring their hatred on someone innocent?
    Being they are parents and you were the child, did it ever seem that you were the one who parented them!!!!! (seems that way when I read this)
    It isn't fair and it's really upside down, the devil is ""the liar''', he is always going to lie to us!!
    Satan is a copycat of power that is reversed or 360* of what God (our real father) is.
    I was always wondering the same things from certain few that carried this family burden through their entire life.

    Answer by coffeeyum at 1:30 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I've had this issue for a long time. My father is a paedophile. My conclusion is I honoured him by not ending his life, by giving him the minimum respect as another living being and to not go out of my way to make his remaining life miserable. He doesn't even deserve any of that but that's how I honour the person who is my father.

    Answer by isabellalecour at 9:26 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • ive always taken it as the way you act reflects on your parents. so if you are a good person that honors your parents, even if they werent always good parents. by learning from their mistakes and being a good parent, you honor yours.

    Answer by okmanders at 10:37 AM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I do not have time to explain this right now as I need to head out the door to school but
    I will tell you this.. do a study on honor... you will find its not what you think it is and many people even Christians lack the understanding of its meaning. If this is still here tonight I will try to answer this in more depth !

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 10:48 AM on Jan. 6, 2011