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Question for caregivers

How do you deal with or handle parent's who just don't get it?
I'm talking about parent's who don't regularly baithe their children and send them with food ontheir faces and in their hair. Massive tangled knots and long dirty nails. Wearing pj's or clothes that are too small and not weather appropriate or necessairly clean. This family is in no way unable to provide. They have the financial means they just seem lazy. I care for these children and have tried many times to talk with the parent's and it seems to fall on deaf ears.
If you are a caregiver in a similar situation please share your expereince and how you dealt with it and if you recognize these traits in your parenting please share with me why????

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:48 PM on Jan. 6, 2011 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • When I was in a similar situation I actually ended up needing to call DCFS. The kids smelled bad. I had to stick them in the bath and wash their clothes the moment they got to my home. I bought clothes for them to wear at my house. When I was done bathing them (and this was done every single day) I had to wash the filth out of the bathtub. The parents were poor, but that is no excuse for their children being that dirty and unwashed every single day. Then I found out the kids just wandered the house all day while the parents slept until 3 or 4:00 pm, and I had to call the authorities.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 2:54 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I had one child that constantly came to me filthy. Her diaper bag smelled so bad that I put it outside during the day. Clothes didn't fit properly, even down to the shoes. I would bathe her and wash her clothing and the bag blaming it on some "spill" that we had. I called and reported it several times before CPS finally paid a visit to the home for neglect. And actually I don't think it was because I kept calling alone, I know the school principal put in a call because an older child from the home was coming to school just as unkept.

    You should call and report. It is untelling what could be going on at home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:54 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • i watch a child whose parents are very well dressed,work full time,but are too busy to dress their kid in appropriate sizes. he is 3.5 and just got toddler socks- has been wearing infant socks for over a year that he has been in my care. i say things in a polite nice way sometimes several times...his hair is very dirty and i almsot gave him a bath but didnt want to upset you or his pants are too small- she would send clothes 2 sizes too small so i would wait a few weeks and say these are way too small- takes weeks to get new clothes-never the right size,nails need clipping i may mention it. i think i am around him more than he is so they just are clueless. that is why they have a childcare provider so they dont have to deal with it.
    anyway i will say things but in a nice and polite way. you dont want them to be offended just aware. i wills ay thigns several times if needed. GL.
    stargazer74

    Answer by stargazer74 at 3:05 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I use to be a caregiver to dirty kids. I would wash their clothes. As long as they are not abused I would just let it go. I have a dd whose hair is never kept to y liking because she screams bloody murder until I just give her the brush and let her do it herself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:06 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • When kids come that stink or their clothes stink then I stick them in the bath tub and give them a fast bath and wash their clothes and put their extra set of clothes on them until there other clothes are washed and I just don't say anything to the parents and aventually my parent got the the non verbal message and no body got upset and it took awhile but the kid stopped comming to daycare with an oder.
    Tdaycare6678

    Answer by Tdaycare6678 at 3:33 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

  • I have been watching these girls for over a year now and I've politely said things and when they first started coming I would baithe them and wash their clothes. I told the parent's I did this and they were fine with it. I kept clothes here for them that were clean and I would change them until I got sick of taking care of their kids how they should be! I am a caregiver not their parent. They've had cps called on them for bogus things like abuse and such and the worker never sees how disgusting things get because it's a scheduled visit and the house is cleaned and the kids dressed nicely and baithed. It's frustrating. I told the mom the other day that her dd was scratching her face and her nails need to be cut. Another thing I used to do too and refuse to do now. I'm at my wits end right now, ignorign things makes me aggrivated, talking to them about it makes me more aggrivated. I'm at a loss....
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:43 PM on Jan. 6, 2011

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