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3 Bumps

Is there a reason to worry because I haven't heard an, "I love you" from my boyfriend yet?

My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now. We are really close. We've been through so much together already, share secrets with eachother. There are so many positive things about our relationship. We know eachother's family and split famliy functions. I stay at his place for weeks at a time. But we still give eachother their own space. It really feels like we could marry eachother some day. At least that's how I feel. But I don't want to rush into those feelings just yet. I just want to know/hear that he loves me. I know I'm inlove with him. He is the best person I know. What worries me is that I'm his first fong-term girlfriend. And I'm scared that may be the reason he hasn't said it yet. I already made the mistake of telling him "i love you" 3 months into the relationship. He said he needed time. But he didn't freak out. I haven't said it again since then because I don't want to pressure him. I need insight.

Answer Question

Asked by bright_eyes87 at 1:14 AM on Jan. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Me and my DF told each other that we loved one another a few months into the relationship, but we weren't saying it a lot, it was just an understanding, the mushy stuff came as we grew closer, the love grew. I would say if he hasn't said it and it's been a year maybe you could be upfront and ask him and if he says he doesn't after a year, maybe it's time to go.

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 1:21 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • just be upfront and ask him how exactly does he feel about you. listen to his answer,see if he is beating around the bush.

    Answer by maya123 at 1:32 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • Unfortunately some guys feel they don't have to love someone in order to sleep with them. Sounds like your guy. If you've been together a year and he hasn't said that then it sounds to me like he doesn't and is just using you for sex and whatever else you do for him. IMO

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 1:56 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • Have you seen 'He's Just Not That Into You'?

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:06 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • one word...... RUN!!!!!

    Answer by FITmama2B at 2:11 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • if the man wants to be with you....... he will move mountains to keep u

    Answer by FITmama2B at 2:12 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • "I stay at his place for weeks at a time. " "I'm his first long-term girlfriend." Do you have children? Do they stay with you for weeks at a time? How old is this guy? Could it be that he is afraid of commitment that comes with love and family? Yes, I would ask him straight out, if he doesn't feel that way or think that he will in the future, then I would leave the relationship, since you seem to be looking for love. If he says he loves you, but is afraid of commitment and family life, then you need to access whether those are things that you need.

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 2:47 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • We said it after 2 1/2 months. If at a year and he hasn't said it, I'd be out of that relationship. Ask him flat-out ad if he doesn't love you, you have to move on. Don't invest yourself in someone that won't do it back.

    Answer by rio_burb at 8:49 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • One year is plenty of time dear. You need to open the air and have a discussion about this before you spend one more hour over at his place. My initial response is that you should pack your bags and run as far from him as you can get. I think there is a problem here. He is having his cake, is what it sounds like to me.

    Answer by spottedpony at 11:33 AM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • He's a guy, they don't always think of the lovely dovey stuff lol

    Without knowing about your situation, maybe your giving off some signs that you wouldn't be open to that kind of statement. I'd communicate with him. Say it to him and see what his response is.

    Answer by Zoeyis at 8:07 AM on Jan. 8, 2011

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