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My son is almost 2 and such a cry baby HeLP

My son is going on two and ever since he was born he has been a cry baby. I thought it had to do with me being sad alot when I was pregnant. But he never grew out of it. And the main problem now is that ever since he was a baby he was picky about ppl holding him. Never could get a baby sitter and at two he is still the same way even with family he sees all the time. He falls out cries just if someone speaks to him its crazy. It makes me so mad and its embrasses me. How do I handle him. He acts so ugly.

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Sky_Mom

Asked by Sky_Mom at 10:07 PM on Nov. 11, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 15 (1,904 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Well, all kids experience terrible twos differently. Mine isn't a cry baby but he does throw LOTS of fits. As of him being a cry baby since he was a baby, he might just be a Mommy's boy.... I know that's not helpful, but over time you can sort of "ween" him away from that stage. Once he gets older he will realize how things work and also realize that he can't continue acting this way with everyone.
    AshJoe05

    Answer by AshJoe05 at 10:53 PM on Nov. 11, 2008

  • It sounds to me like you're getting pretty frustrated. I would too considering you can't even leave him with a sitter, and even the best moms need to get away. Find someone that you fully trust to care for him, and just go. Maybe for an hour. Do this a couple times a week, a bit long each time. Don't stop and look back when he cries. He'll get over it. Trust me. My daughter does this to my husband every time he tries to go somewhere without her, and now she's finally realizing that he DOES come back.
    crdc91506

    Answer by crdc91506 at 12:09 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • Pick one day a week that he goes to a sitters or grandmas and leave him there for a short time a first, them longer and longer each time, he will probably cry for 2 minutes then be fine. He is controlling you and it works so he will keep doing it. The next time he throws a fit ignore him and walk away out of his site (if it's in a store or something walk to where he cant see you but you can see him) when he realizes you aren't falling for it he will stop and want to find you. It may take some patients and time but it does work and you will be doing you and ur son a great service to stop it now. It is all to get attention or his own way.
    Cherish050307

    Answer by Cherish050307 at 12:14 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • Normal .........and he is still a baby! only been here for 2 years thats not too long...he is trying to figure out where he stands in this world and the poor baby does not understand his emotions it is your job as his mother to help him, calm him down when he is upset hold him when he is pissed let him know you are there for him!
    BUSYMAMA5

    Answer by BUSYMAMA5 at 12:25 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • He may be feeling anxious. In order for him to continue to do the same thing over and over again he is getting something from it. So ask yourself what is he getting out of these crying spells? My bet is the response. Think about how you respond to him. Change that up. My guess is that it is extensive separation anxiety. Now that he has had two years worth of behavior training it is going to take some time. Do hire a babysitter who doesn't mind crying spells (a neighbor, a friend, grandma) and let them come for about an hour. Tell him way before that so and so is comming to watch him. He may start acting sad, nervous, whinning then. Reassure him that you love him and that you will be back. Don't delay when the person comes over. Say good-bye, smile, and leave. Don't bribe him with a cookie or say you will bring him back a toy.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:26 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • cont...Establish a routine where you go out a few times a week while he is with a sitter. It won't hurt him to cry for a few hours. He will tire himself out. You may want to consider tipping your sitter well though. Do go on regular dates with your husband as well. Always prepare him and don't sneak away. You will make the anxiety worse. The other thought I had was asking if he has a steady routine at home. Children who have no routine often are more anxious than other children. They don't handle transition well and are not sure what to expect next. So starting a good routine from morning until bed time, one that is not rushed, is important. Tell him what is going to happen next to prepare him. "After dinner we are taking your bath." Then always follow through so he trusts when you say something is going to happen it does.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:30 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • cont...I am a big fan of reading books to children about what they are experiencing. Check out age appropriate books from the library on mom/dad leaving the kid with a sitter. Ask the librarian to help pick out a few. Then snuggle before bed and read. Then reread and reread. He'll get it. Another thing is to role play with his dolls or stuffed animals. Have a mom and dad leave the baby home with grandma/sitter/neighbor. Have him help act out the scene. Do this casually and suggest playing Mommy and Daddy's date night or Mommy's morning out. Children learn through repetition and play. It will sink in. Do be patient. It is going to take a lot of time to undue all the anxiety and stress the little guy feels after two years.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:36 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • cont...and if he cries when you have visitors or at other times when there is "no reason to" it is okay. He has a right to his feelings. But you have a right not to listen to him scream, sob, and yell. So put him in a cozy, calm, and safe place he can hang at until he can get a grip. For my son it is his travel play yard. I have his blanket and pillow in there with a stuffed animal. I leave him in it and walk away for just a few minutes. I come back and ask him if he is okay now. I also tell him he can cry, its okay to, but not to the point where he is screaming or hanging on to my leg. He usually settles down b/c he can't get the reaction he wants. If he doesn't calm down its back to his cozy spot for a little break. Good luck and stick with it.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:41 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • Don't take this the wrong way, but do, please be honest with yourself- how often does mommy act ugly??
    Our children are products of their environment.. They have their own minds, thoughts, and feelings, but they feed off of what happens around them..
    Do you spend enough quality time with him? Straight one on one time, baking cookies, colouring, playing music, etc??
    How do you approach the situations when he starts throwing fits? Do you yell and scream, or get down on his level and ask what is wrong? Do you tell him it's okay to be sad, but not okay to scream?

    (cont)
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 12:56 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • When my 2 year old is really bouncing of the walls, wailing and storming about it is usually because she is frustrated about something, or way over-tired.

    I take her to her room, without screaming and shouting at her, sit on her bed with her, and tell her it's time for a time out. (But it's really a time-in, because I dont' leave her).. I let her scream and shout, and tell her to tell me when she is done, ready to listen, and ready for a hug..
    Since I have become consistent with this, it doesn't take her very long at all..
    Usually it's that one on one attention she craves, and also, the moment away from everything just so she CAN collect her feelings.. It's hard to be heard when the house is full- both for me to hear her, and for her to hear me..
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 12:58 AM on Nov. 12, 2008

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