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How can i transition him to full time dad?

I recently got back w my son's father we seperated when our son was born and are back together now a yr and a half later. He is used to having him every other weekend and we're together every day now and he still acts like a part time parent he has gone out 3x this week and expects me to do pretty much everything for our son. Just wondering if you have any suggestions how i can approach this w/o being a bitch or starting an arguement? I dont wanna make him feel like a bad dad but i wanna get my point across tht i'm not gonna everything, i'm not a single parent anymore so i shouldn't have to feel like one.

 
Logan17000

Asked by Logan17000 at 10:28 PM on Jan. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 6 (87 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I would sit down and talk to him one evening were he isn't going out and doesn't have any special plans. Tell him what you need and why. Ask him what he needs and see if you can get a why as well. THen ask how are we are going to do this. We both want this family to work how can we get all of our needs meet. And the two of you come up with a plan to help and support the family so everyones needs are met. This way you are not nagging not bitching, but asking for his help to make it work. And make sure you put in their couple time, so you don't become roommates.
    DevilInPigtails

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 10:40 PM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • Well, first of all, stop thinking that you will be bitching at him. You are instead demanding that there be certain rules met, such as acting like an adult and not a child. When you become a parent, the partying should pretty much cease. It's your responsibility to raise a child and not act like one instead. However, if you don't stop this, how can you see yourself becoming a family? It sounds like he has some major growing up to do. You need lay down the law, so to speak. If he don't want to follow, maybe it's not such a good thing that you aren't a single mom anymore.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 10:32 PM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • Demanding? "laying down the law"? WTF? It's a relationship not a prison. Just talk with him and tell him how you feel and what you expect from him
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:39 PM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • well i went from raising my daughter for 2yrs by myself and my bf helps me out now,, but just sit back and watch if he knows what to do, just sit back and wait for him to do it, i mean i come home from work and pass out sometimes and my bf that doesnt have any kids knows how to get dinner and take care of my daughter, so iam pretty sure someone with kids can do it..
    kyiahsmommy

    Answer by kyiahsmommy at 10:43 PM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • Is there anything you can ask him to do when he is home? Like when you are making dinner ask him to do something with/for son, even if it is changing a diaper or little. Also ask him to do a certain part of the bedtime routine. The next night say can you do that again, it is so nice to have you around to help and not do it all on my own. He most likely has no clue what to do or what is expected and just needs some guidance. I think eventually you will get into a routine and his night outs will slow down.
    JamieLK

    Answer by JamieLK at 10:45 PM on Jan. 7, 2011

  • Just sit down and talk with him about it. Let him know that he's a full-time dad now. When he says that he's going out for those three times a week, tell him you already have plans and that he's staying home with your son.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:59 AM on Jan. 8, 2011

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