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No life

I have no life. It's all about the kids. I have several married (with no kids) and single friends that can't or don't seem to understand that I too bloody damn tired to go out. I have 2 kids (3 if you count hubby on the weekends) that I care for 24/7. When they're sleeping all I want to do is relax, shower and sleep. I love my kids and wouldn't change a single decision that hubby & I made but I so wish our friends could understand.

Am I the only one that feels this way?

 
OliviaW.

Asked by OliviaW. at 7:26 PM on Jan. 8, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 10 (444 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • It sounds to me like you have a great life! Just not a social life. And some ppl will just never understand!
    genagina

    Answer by genagina at 7:27 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • You need to find some new friends who also have children around the same age as yours. One suggestion is meetup.com and look for a mothers' group. Then they'll not only understand how you feel but they'll be more willing to work around your schedule and you can plan get-togethers that include your children.
    ceallaigh

    Answer by ceallaigh at 7:39 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • I often feel the same way..but for similiar but different reasons. When our sons were grown we had a large group of friends. We played cards, went on vacations togheter, camping..lots of things. When we had to take custody of the Gkids it was as if someone slammed the brakes on in the car and everyone else kept cruising. Literally all but 2 of our friends just drifted away. They could no longer relate to the scarifices in the personal life that get made due to very young children and their schedules. So people our own age don't get it....and people that have kids the age of oour gkids are the same age as our children and in spite of the kids we have very little in common. I completely understand.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 7:47 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • Check for a pulse. I think you'll find you have a life --it's just not the one you see on tv. Or thought you'd have. Or something.

    Sounds like you need to get new friends. Other parents with kids at the same ages and stages (or just past them) will understand, probably would like another family or two to socialize with. You can meet in parks, or share meals, or do things like canning or making food in advance, or re-decorating a room, sorting through clothes to donate (or share with them)... there's a great Mothering Magazine article here that might help you see how you could enrich your life without making difference choices, or sacrificing anything:

    http://www.mothering.com/parenting/feed-your-soul-while-feeding-your-kids
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 7:29 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • I have no social life either... Its weird because when I have the option of going out with my hubby or without him I feel sort of guilty if I leave my girls. I have a 3 1/2 and 2 year old. I work full time and on the weekends I love to spend them with my girls eventhough they drive me crazy. Sometimes I feel like I dont have a life and dont have any friends but when my daughters get a lil older I think it will get better for me.
    fayth13

    Answer by fayth13 at 9:32 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • My kids are all grown and gone and I still don't have a life. I put my kids first all the time so when I found myself divorced and alone I forgot how to "live" so here I sit on CM each night
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:32 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • Your life are your kids for now it won't always be this way.
    older

    Answer by older at 7:33 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • I understand what you are saying completely. Ever since I had kids, it seems like my "friends" don't wanna hang out anymore... even though most of them have kids too, they have the option to just shove their kids off on anyone who will take them while they go party and do what they want.... I am NOT that kind of person. So I have pretty much lost quite a few friends over the past 5 years but that 's okay... it just shows you who your true friends are. I still have a few close friends that still enjoy spending time with me, kids or not. Last night I had my cousin and his wife over (she is one of my good friends) and I made dinner and then we watched a movie while the kids played in the toy room ... and they don't even have kids... but they still like me. LoL. So yeah, it's that you have no life, it's just that your friends might not understand that your LIFE is different now!
    JenMarie2007

    Answer by JenMarie2007 at 7:55 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

  • No I know how you feel. All day you are busy with the house and kids then night time comes and you just want sleep, that's how I feel everyday. But I love my life and most of the time I'm happy with it. I do try to set aside a night every couple of months just to go out with my friends.
    CadincesMom

    Answer by CadincesMom at 8:49 PM on Jan. 8, 2011

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