Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Am I in the wrong? Long but need advice.....

My daughter wanted a Barbie birthday aprty this year for her 5th with Barbie coming and the girls got makeup on and theit hair done. My best friend of 17 years has a 6 year old son and a almost 2 year old daughter. My daughter and her son just love each other but don't see each other that much. Since it was an all girls party and what boy would want to come to this party, I invited her littel girl. I thought she was a little young but she loves dressup and makeup already. I didn't want the son to get upset so I told my friend not to tell him about the party and I didn't even send an invite to the house to be sure he didn't see it. Yesturday before the party started, she calls me and I can tell that she is filling me out to see if the son can come. And I said my daughter wanted all girl party this year and even the grandpa's (that she loves dearly) aren't coming. Her son overheard her talking to her Dh about the party.So she said that she wasn't going to bring her daughter because it wasn't fair to the son. And I said well then bring him and my daughter walked in the room and I asked her if she cared if he came, & of course she didn't. But the way i looked at it, was invite none or invite all her male friends because she is alot closer to the ones at school anyway. So my best friend didn't come and I just wonder was I in the wrong here? Why would he want to come? Why would my best friend do my daughter like that by not bringing the girl or bringing them both after I told her too. We were going to get together last night and let him give my daughter her presents but I was too pissed! Am I wrong?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:18 PM on Jan. 9, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (20)
  • It was an ALL girls BARBIE party. Of course you werent in the wrong. She knew that from the start.
    Misteh

    Answer by Misteh at 2:20 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • You should've had different dress up clothes and toys for the boy and invited him anyway. Since he is a family friend he should've been included, especially since you were inviting her daughter. It was wrong to exclude him like that.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:20 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • is your DD wanted her friend that was a boy, he should have been invited. it never should have been kept from him. then he feels like he did something wrong.
    itzmyzoo

    Answer by itzmyzoo at 2:20 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • I think it was wrong to hide it from him and say he is not allowed because he is a boy. I understand that a boy would most likely not want to attend a Barbie party but he still should have been given the option to decide that for himself, not have his friend's birthday party hidden from him but his younger sister allowed to go. Other than that, I don't think you were wrong.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • I think the 2 year old should not have been invited. And it should not have been kept from the 6 year old boy. I think you are overreacting to be pissed. Chalk it up to a big screw up and talk it over with your frined. Life is too short to let this damage the friendship.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 2:29 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • I think that it's okay to invite "all girls" or "all boys" to a party, especially at that age. I think I would have told my friend, she's having an all girl birthday party, but I thought it would be fun if we took the kids to "Chuck E. Cheese" for lunch to celebrate" or whatever you have near you. I have all boys and was never offended when my friends with girls didn't invite them to a "girls only" party. To be honest, my boys wouldn't have wanted to go to a Barbie Party....in fact, when I wanted to get out of the house without them I'd tell them I was going to a Barbie Party so they wouldn't want to come!!!
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 2:29 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • I kinda think you are wrong, the little boy could have dressed up as Ken.. i don't know about you but me and my bestfriends.. we bend over backwords for one another No ones kids get left behind ;) And kids have a hard time understanding why wasn't i invited. I understand that you wanted an all girls party but little ones really don't care about stuff like that. they just want to have fun with their friends at that age.
    BobbieJo286

    Answer by BobbieJo286 at 2:29 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • It is not nice not to invite someone just because he is a boy. Especially when you invite the too young sister just because she is a girl. I think you were on the wrong side and if someone do it with my children I would do the same (don't go to the party at all). I wouldn't let anyone choose one of my children over the other. Especially that the boy was your sister's friend not the baby sister. If your daughter wanted a Barbie party than the boys could be Ken, Barbie's boyfriend. Or you could make up a Toy story birthday party (because Barbie and Ken were in it.) How would you feel in the same situation if someone wouldn't invite your children... Or only one of them because of some silly favouring one over the other.

    adriennfaklya

    Answer by adriennfaklya at 2:30 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • OP here- So ya'll are saying that I should have invited him to an all girls party so he would be hating life after he got here and what about all other other male friends? Like her family members that she is close too? I felt like invite them all or none. Maybe I should not have invited the sister either but I felt like since she was a girl, she would want to come. If he had an all boys party, I wouldn't get mad if my daughter wasn't invited to his all boy party!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:30 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

  • i would've wanted him to know and also to know that it's a girl's party but mom can bring him some cake back. i think not telling him and him finding out was really mean and it seems like it caused a lot more drama than just inviting him in the first place, with that being said your bff shouldn't have considered bringing her dd without her ds if she wasn't going to THAT day. a lot of confusion could have been missed if she would have just said no, not with my son bc it's not fair. however i hope she gets used to it not being fair bc when her child goes to school each of her kids will be invited to parties without the other one.
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 2:33 PM on Jan. 9, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN