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Why are some mothers are afriad of there kids

Why are moms afraid to say no to their kids and afraid to put their foot down when it comes to putting their kids in check when they get out of line with their parents.when i got out of line with my parts oh boy it was ass whopping time

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tinamarie1972

Asked by tinamarie1972 at 6:15 AM on Jan. 10, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 17 (4,197 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Ass-whooping never worked for me. It made me sassier as a child and it made me lose a bit of respect for the parent that did it. I think ass-whooping is a lazy way of disciplining your child - takes the least amount of effort on the parent's part, but does a lot of psychological damage on the child.

    On the other hand, I think some mothers (and fathers) have the wrong idea about what parenting is. They think there job is to be a "friend" and they treat their kids like peers. They worry if they upset the kid, even if it for the kids own good, that the kid won't "like" them anymore. A parent's job is not to be liked. A parent's job is to care for and guide a child. If that means sometimes the kid decides he/she hates your guts, so be it. If you are a good parent, your child will love and cherish you when he/she is grown.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:21 AM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Let me add, that kids have more respect for parents that act like parents, not like "friends." I am not saying you have to wait until they are grown for them to love you. Most kids will love you for being a good parent, even if in the moment they seem like they don't.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:24 AM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • When it comes to many of my friends, they are so afraid that if they don't give their kids everything they want, that they will be permanently scarred for life. As a result, they are a bunch of spoiled brats who have everything, appreciate nothing, and believe they are entitled to everything their hearts desire. Kids need boundaries, and parents need to establish and enforce those boundaries. Many parents don't want to do that because they don't want to be the "bad" guy; too bad they don't realize what damage it causes.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:33 AM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Some people don't want to treat their kids the way they were raised; maybe they didn't have many things, their parents were very strict, there was abuse, etc. Other times I think it's laziness; its so much easier to just let the kids make the rules. I'm not a yeller or a beater, but my kids know that when I say no I mean it. There's a balance, it just takes work to find it.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 8:07 AM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • its called CPS...some people thing just because you spank your child or smack their hands that you are a child abuser and will call CPS on you, or that you are emotionally abusing them if you yell at them...

    me personally idc what other ppl think, if my 4 or 2 year old need a spanking or something they will get it.
    2boysmommy.js

    Answer by 2boysmommy.js at 9:13 AM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • They're afraid they're going to fail as a parent.
    They're afraid their kids are going to hate them or resent them for diciplining them.
    They're afraid they're limiting their children by restricting them from things. Which means their children may possibly be unhappy.

    There's a lot of reasons as to why a parent chooses not to diciplin their child. Or diciplin them properly. All in all it's just an insecurity with them as a parent. They have demons, so to speak, that they fight with. Some parents acknowledge their faults, but are either too timid to change or don't know how. Whereas others are oblivious to their own faults and either blame the child or society.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:51 AM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • I give people the benefit of kindness. Some kids live with severe trauma, developmental disorders, and other mental health issues....none the result of poor parenting. A child may look "normal" but in reality live with some pretty hefty issues. What may look like poor parenting may be the best way to cope with their child. As far as I know I have yet to see a neon sign on a child's forehead that says: Autism. Or: I am a victim of rape. But to be honest, when I hear parents threaten an ass whooping...my heart breaks for that child. I am more tuned in to the parent who is frustrated than I am to a child who may be tired, hungry, or not feeling well.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:21 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • I have a friend that is like that... mostly becasue she doesnt want to be the bad guy and his bio dad lets him run the show. Sometimes I am the one who has to put her child back in line... when he is in my house, he acts right or he leaves. I dont allow disrespect in my house. I am actually about fed up with his back talking his mom and I seriously limit the time he is around my child.
    sarlove01

    Answer by sarlove01 at 12:29 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

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