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When I met my husband and became pregnant, I knew I had to put my dreams on hold so he can peruse his dream in the military. I did get to college and get my medical assistant certificate. I want to be a RN but settled for MA since there was a long waiting list for RN. My husband promised me that I will get to go to school again once he gets back from deployment.
Well he was told he can't re-enlist and now he's coming home. He told me we are going to be living with his mother (HELP ME!) while he goes to school for plumbing and RN. He hates RN! He isn't even interested in the medical field, never has been. He said he's doing it because he heard it makes good money. He rather make good money then be in a job he enjoys. He told me to get a job that pays at lease $15 a hour. (yeah right...) So I can support him while he goes to school. HE wanted me to be a SAHM when we got married. He didn't want me working at all. I wanted a job so bad but figured I'll respect his wishes for right now till my kids get a bit older.
I'm really hurt he's going after my dream.... I wanted to be a RN, I wanted it since I was n the 9th grade. I feel my dreams keep getting pushed aside so he can continue his. He has a chance to join the Army but he won't because he wants to be here for his mom. (she's a drama queen and a hydroconriact, SP?)
He keeps giving me empty promises... I left my life behind and gave things up for his dreams but he refuses to give up a few things to I can get to my dreams...
Believe me he told me he hates the medical field but is only doing for the money it will bring.


Asked by mommy_of_two388 at 6:00 PM on Jan. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Level 43 (154,356 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • well, then, he won't last long. i hate to say it, but, girl, you'd better have a serious talk with him, and not us. he needs to be compromising, especially since its always been you doing the compromising (or holding-off). nursing is not a laugh-a-minute career. its hard work..not to mention the schooling/studying isn't a cake-walk, either!
    you need to step up to the plate, mommy. assert yourself and your position..its your turn; he's had his chances. you realize if you continue to back down, he'll always be running from one thing to another..and your dream will never come to fruition. IMO, he needs to man-up, so you can woman-up. its a 50-50 situation.
    besides, you need to have something in your back pocket..because you never know what the future holds. i say, hold your ground and go after that RN degree. perhaps he needs to be the SAHD/parttime-worker, for YOU.
    good luck, op!

    Answer by dullscissors at 6:07 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Enroll in school NOW! It's really not as hard as it is made out to be when you have kids. You can do it. Get into before the only life you have ever lived for is his. Follow your dream!!

    Answer by Andriya at 6:03 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • well, if it will bring in good money, then why can't u do it? honestly, if you want to go so bad, i would tell him to get the hell over it. why can't both of you be rn's?
    if he keeps it up i would leave and be what you want to be, being a stay at home mom isn't for everyone, i am one, and it is not for me....but i don't deal well with people....anyways, do what you need to do and what want to do. youre a grown ass woman......good luck sweets!

    Answer by mama2bof2 at 6:11 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • I think you should pursue your schooling, you can get your prerequisites out of the way with online classes. I will tell you that I put my dh's dreams ahead of mine and followed him everywhere. Although I did get my degree (2 actually) caring for my family (elderly to my special needs child) I am stranded lol. I know it will be difficult, but you have a right to be true to yourself,

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 6:16 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Life happens when you are busy making plans. Think about it.

    Answer by Andriya at 6:04 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • You need to have the chat with him he served it his turn to get a job and support you while you do the RN thing.

    Answer by karing4elmas at 9:13 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • There is no way we can live if both of us are in school. Plus it wi;; cause more problems in our marriage


    Comment by mommy_of_two388 (original poster) at 6:04 PM on Jan. 10, 2011