Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

6 Bumps

Deal-breakers in a relationship?

I am starting to date again after being married for 10 years. I want to know what the deal-breakers are for you personally. I don't want to shun a decent man just because he doesn't dress a certain way or just because his teeth aren't the brightest white they can be. What are your deal-breakers? I am 36 and would be dating men that are 35-45 (if that matters).

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:50 PM on Jan. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • a wife
    no job
    no car
    criminal record

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 8:50 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Cheating and lying are deal breakers for me. And not being good to my kids.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 8:51 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Cheating
    Any form of abuse
    Addiction he refuse to give up or seek help for
    Refuses to compromise and show respect
    Only thinks of himself

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 8:51 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • He can't be a right wing religious nut, needs to have a good job, doesn't hunt, watch Nascar, wear a wife beater and drink a bud can out by the 3 trucks on his front lawn. Must be intelligent, funny, sensitive and strong. Oh, and he has to be taller than me. =)

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:52 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Other than the obvious (drug dealer/user, abusive, etc) the number one deal breaker is if he hated kids.


    Answer by JeremysMom at 8:52 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • If I were single and looking at starting a relationship:

    No job
    Living with someone due to the inability to support yourself financially.
    Young children.. Children in general unless they are adult children who have left home and are own their own.
    Control issues.. I'm a 48 yr old woman, I'm not looking for nor do I need a "daddy".
    Sub-par employment.. At this age and stage of the game, I would not date a person that is a minimum wager earner in a "dead end" job.

    Those are my basic starter deal breakers.. as a relationship develops into a long term relationship.. I have other deal breakers that come into play then.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 8:55 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Finding out he's married, finding out he lied about something big (a small lie, like "Why yes I DO like pasta!" when he doesn't wouldn't bother me), if got mean with me or my child(ren), not being able to support himself, selfishness, not accepting my religious beliefs (or trying to convert me), being bald (just kidding!), being a control freak, being close minded... That's all I can think of but I'm sure there are probably a few more.

    Answer by Mrs.BAT at 8:59 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • has a wife or girlfriend
    no job
    living like a frat boy
    too much of a party life
    booty calls lol
    psycho exes lol I have too much drama already
    too many lies
    more than 2 ex wives....I found out i was wife #6 after we were married
    has a child they are not involved with....if you have a child own up and raise the child, they need both parents in their lives
    wow....looks like I'm never gonna start dating lol

    Answer by proudmama101906 at 9:06 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Deal breakers for me would be unfaithfulness and dishonesty. Also, if the man were to threathen or hit me, I'm out of there.

    Answer by virgo550 at 9:08 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Well not that Im dating but when I was I totally had a list...
    Had to had a good job
    Doesnt live at home with mommy and daddy
    Have his kids full time or paid child support (if had kids)
    Had to open my doors
    No baby mamma drama
    is jealous
    cant tell me what I can and cant do
    Needs to be SINGLE

    Answer by kiansmom0423 at 9:52 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.