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4 Bumps

What would you say?

Ok, we live with family out in the country. My kids, who are 6 & 8, catch the bus at the same stop as the two kids down the road. The girl is 10 and the boy is 12. I don`t have a problem with the girl, she seems nice enough. The boy started out polite enough but today he called my dd a lesbian and my ds a homo. He told my kids that my dh and I smoke pot. Which is untrue, I smoke a cigarette once a day but that`s that. Tomorrow morning we will have to wait outside and I have a feeling they will be at our drive way.. what should I say if anything? I don"t want my kids to be afraid but I don`t want to be a bully mom. thoughts.. oh, he gave my kids the middle finger too, sigh...

Answer Question
 
Autumn07

Asked by Autumn07 at 9:38 PM on Jan. 10, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 24 (19,360 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I would just let him know in a stern way that way he is treating your children will not be tolerated and leave it at that for now. Hopefully it will intimidate him a bit.

    skittles1108

    Answer by skittles1108 at 9:41 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • All I can recommend is just talking to the boys parents. No I don't think it's your job to "have a talkin to" someone else's child and you will come off as a bully Mom if you do that. But the best thing you can and should do is talk to his parents, and if it continues see if the school can make a different stop for your kids, or just wait with them every day.
    Razelda

    Answer by Razelda at 9:42 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Talk to the parents and let them know what's going on. You can't discipline someone else's kids, about all you could do is ask him to be nicer. And that would probably make it worse. His parents would be able to handle the problem and would have better luck stopping the behavior.
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 9:45 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • You said you live with family, so is this boy family? If he is, then tell his parents. And I like what skittles said too. A little bit of fear never hurt a bully.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • I agree with Razelda. Talk to the boy's parents - that's the easiest way to avoid being a "bully mom" and the most probable way to ensure that something will change in the boys' behavior.
    When I was younger we had a bully that waited at our bus stop and my mother eventually started waiting with us. It was amazing how differently he acted when an adult was near. =)
    MagischMom

    Answer by MagischMom at 9:46 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Thank you for your comments. :)
    Autumn07

    Comment by Autumn07 (original poster) at 9:48 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • Honestly, the boy is old enough for you to tell him to back off. He wont feel bullied, after all look at hid behavior! His parents are probly too passive anyways. Just tell him "excuse me, you to stop using bad words & that middle finger on my kids, they are younder than you & I dont want them to be learning any of that". Show him you are serious & you DO have a right to say something! If he tells his parents they are probly going to feel bad in the first place that their son did that in the first place. I know kids like that, and those kids you just have to tell them straight! Good Luck *:)
    Milani_Hunni

    Answer by Milani_Hunni at 10:14 PM on Jan. 10, 2011

  • go to his mom now and put a stop to it
    mrs.ernster

    Answer by mrs.ernster at 12:13 AM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I would go to his parents and let them know that you'd like to solve this problem and there son is slandering not only your children but you and your husband. You want it stopped and would like to solve it in a neighborly fashion. The next time they slander you or your children call the cops. Bullies continue to be bullies because people let them.
    mistynights234

    Answer by mistynights234 at 3:27 AM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Sometimes it is ore important to teach your kids about how to cope with unkind kids. This is not the end of kids who will bully them. Only the begining. First, I would make the school and the transportation aware. Not to tell them how to do their jobs but to infirm them of the concern. Their could be other complaints by other parents and students. This helps the school build a history of offences. And in case it gets worse later....you can say you did report your concern earlier. Document who, when, and what the outcome of the discussion was. Then ask for e-mail addresses. Write a follow up
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 8:56 AM on Jan. 11, 2011

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