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School aged daughter humping

My daughter is 5 and just started humping a few months ago. I know it's not abuse because I'm a SAHM and with her constantly. She humps EVERYWHERE. In the front room on the couch, in her car seat, in my bedroom. I've tried to not make her feel humping itself is wrong by telling her that's something she is to do in her room with her blanket. (her brother got grossed out when she humped his) but this weekend her brother told me she told him she was humping a school mate on the school bus! How do i stop all this public humping! I tried talking to her but then she turned around and humped on the couch again yesterday.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:28 PM on Nov. 12, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • cont...It is important that she learn there is an appropriate time and place for private touching or humping. That you did an excellent job with. Great mom skills! Don't appear angry or upset. Trying to find where this originated from is important. Talk to her teachers about it. Ask them to keep their eyes and ears open and report back to you. Also talk to the bus driver. It is important to not acuse or sound like you are saying your child was assaulted or exposed at school. They will get defensive as if you think they are not doing their job. Or they will try to make your daughter the aggressor. You are just trying to find out what is going on. Also, do you go to church? Children, when left alone, will be curious and share and explore with each other.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 1:29 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • Talk to a doctor? I know at a certain point that is normal for children to do, but I think to that extreme is probably not.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 12:30 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • seek medical help.
    Punish her for what she is doing. She needs to know that is wrong and she cannot do that.
    good luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:32 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • Ummmm...if she is in school and riding the school bus you are not with her constantly. Take her to the Ped for an evaluation...just to make sure. And the PP is right to a certain degree it is a normal experience, but this sounds a little excessive...most children hump if something makes contact (like carseat, etc) but to seek out objects to hump against seems odd to me. Better safe than sorry I always say. The Ped. can probably recommend a behavioral program/style for you to try and eliminate this behavior.
    Kimebs

    Answer by Kimebs at 1:22 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • You don't want her to feel dirty, digusting, unlovable, or wrong. You said she is not abused becasue you are a stay at home mom...but then you said your daughter was riding the school bus. Which means that she IS not with you all the time. It may not be that she was sexually assaulted but she was exposed to sexual content somewhere and she is acting it out. It does not mean she has a porno running through her head. (I worked with kids as a therapist, some who did have these behaviors) Sometimes we do it out of comfort because, quite frankly, it feels good. But my guess, and it is just a guess, that she is being reactive to things that some other child/children or something she saw. Unfortunately school bus rides are infamous for educating children on sexual behaviors.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 1:24 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • cont...play dates, cousins,...ect. Sit down with her when she has been playing and has been in a good mood. Talk to her about curiosity vs. abuse. Let her know that being curious is not unhealthy BUT give examples of unhealthy touches. Use the work unhealthy instead of bad so she doesn't think she is bad or will get in trouble. Do send her to a personal space when she displays sexual behavior. Do make sure that no other children are put at risk by her behaviors. Do seek out a counselor for a few sessions. It may only take just a few. This behavior in no ways means she was abused but her continued actions in public are inappropriate and do suggest that she may have been exposed to something somewhere. Possibly not, but I would be concerned.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 1:35 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • She started humping BEFORE school started

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:06 PM on Nov. 12, 2008