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scared

My ex husband tried breaking into my house last night, I told him he needed to leave or I would call the cops, he left right away. Then this morning I left to drop my son off at daycare and when I came back he had left a note on my door (saying he loves me life isn't worth it with out me blah blah blah). He has mental health issues and when he doesn't take his meds he can be scary. I was so terrified last night I cried all night and was shaking, he's so much bigger then me that if he wanted to hurt me I couldn't stop him. I'm now afraid to open the blinds, I'm scared he's watching me, I'm afraid of what he'll do when he finds out that I'm dating again. I hate being this scared in my own home!!!!!!!! I already talked to my lawyer, there's not really much I can do unless he threatens to hurt me or is violent towards me. He hasn't he just says horrible things one minute designed to make me feel bad and the next is saying that I misunderstood him and all he wants is to be with me. help? support? advice?

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gypsymama532

Asked by gypsymama532 at 3:08 PM on Jan. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,932 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • i would suggest possibly getting a restraining order. say that you are scared for you and your childs saftey
    Phippsandrea

    Answer by Phippsandrea at 3:18 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I think you need to document all this but I do not think that his issues are that mental . It seem that he is doing things to stay just below the line of getting arrested but really careful and be sure to get all the doors and windows check to be sure that he can not get in. Giid luck and you will be in my prays.
    karing4elmas

    Answer by karing4elmas at 3:24 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • You need to talk to an organization that supports battered women. You are mentally under attack. Look up a national hotline if you don't have a local one.
    Whimsee

    Answer by Whimsee at 3:26 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I say get that restraining order and take some self defense classes or karate. helped me when i was threatened by an ex. after our problems finally dissolved i still feel empowered knowing i can take care of myself should a situation arise where i need to defend myself. good luck.
    Bugzmomma

    Answer by Bugzmomma at 3:28 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I lived this exact scenereo.
    Get a restraining order asap. Keep phone with you ay all times. Let the day care know what is going on and tell them he is not to pick up your child in any case what so ever. Check around outside your home and make sure that there isnt anything he can pick up and kcock you over the head wit ie shovel etc. I know how embarassing this is but this is your life and your childs let your neighbors know what is going on tell them to call the cops if he is in the area. You cant change the locks untill you are divorced but add a lock this came from my local police when I was in your situation. If you can have a friend or relative spend the night it takes time for cops to come. Dont engage him by talking to him cut off all communication. Change your number if you can. Good luck.
    Contact me if you need to talk or want a shoulder to lean on! Please be careful wory only about yourself and your child
    21lisa72

    Answer by 21lisa72 at 3:28 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • lawyer said there's not enough grounds for a restraining order and certainaly not enough to keep him from his son
    gypsymama532

    Comment by gypsymama532 (original poster) at 3:33 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • My mom went through this with my dad over the summer. It look her 4 months of hell, like what you are going through to finally be able to get a restraining order. Basically, you have to be able to prove that you have reason to be afraid of him. Maybe because of his mental disorder you could get one.
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 3:53 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Sorry, I just read about there not being enough grounds for the restraining order. I would change the locks on the door, get an alarm system and if he ever does anything call 911
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 3:54 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I would go file a police report and then file for an order of protection.
    bcauseimthemom

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 4:01 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

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