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Why would she say that???

Yesterday my me my dh and our 2 kids were at my MIL's house. She is in her 50s and works full time (3, 12 hour shifts a week) as a nurse. Well she was say how tired she is and looked and me and said "it must be nice to get to sit at home all day watching tv!!!!" I have 2 children at home all day with me my dd is 4 (she is still at home, goes to preschool next year) and my ds is almost 2! Plus I babysit my friends kids (boy is 4 and girl is 1 1/2) 2 days a week. I keep our home SPOTLESS. My dh has a wonderful dinner on the table when he gets home AND I make him a home made lunch for work (I freeze the leftovers from dinners and he brings those to work, so at work he has things like pot roast, mashed potatos and gravy) I am also 6 months pregnant. I got married right after high school (yes I was pregnant and she never let anyone forget it too) I am amost 23. She didn't want us to get married because she thinks I married him so he will take care of me and I can sit at home. My husband is the department manager at publix so he makes ok money and will move up through the company as time goes on but he doen't make the kind of money were I would marry him for his money. I don't work because as I got married right after high school, the best job I could get would be entry level and to put 2 children in daycare, that would be most of my paycheck. Plus my husband and I decided that we would rather me stay at home with our children. She makes comments like this all the time but she never says it when he is around. I don't want to tell my dh because last time I told him about something like this, he got so mad at his mom (and dad because he took up for her) that they didn't talk for months. I am just sick of her comments, I work hard for my family and I do it 24/7 not just 3 days a week like her.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:24 PM on Jan. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • You have every right to be mad. From what you've said, you sound like super woman! Good job!!! IMO you should tell your husband. He might get mad at his mom but it's not permanent. I think it's so great you have a DH that supports you!

    Answer by surfngirl at 9:28 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Thank you. I am only watching my friends kids until the baby comes but I do work hard for my family. I take a lot of pride in our home and I keep it so clean and my husband always has his clothes (he wears a shirt and tie to work) wash, ironed and ready for him. My MIL's children (my dh and his sister) both went to day care from the time they were babies and at first I thought she was jelous that I get to stay home with my kids but my dh told me that she sent them to daycare even on days she didn't work

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:34 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Do you say anything back when she makes the comments? That's just rotten of her! You should tell her if she didn't put her kids in daycare all the time, she'd know what it was like taking care of them all day, while keeping house and cooking dinner.
    You should tell your DH. He should know his mommy-dearest is being a bully. Let him stick up for you, he's doing just as he should!

    Answer by Raine2001 at 9:56 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • OMG what a nasty woman she is. I am sorry you have to put up wth that. You know she is trying to make herself feel good by minimizing what you do and telling herself that what she does is better....but she is wrong. She is using that as her own personal ego boost and that is not fair. SHe must have low self esteem or something. Or she is just dumb. LOL>

    Answer by kerp1960 at 10:10 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I think that is horrible! Your husband needs to stand up to her for you. I am a stay at home mom of 2 and I homeschool as well. I think since she was never a stay at home mom she really doesn't know what goes into it. You ROCK and should be proud of yourself!

    Answer by Frogbaby83 at 10:11 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • You might also ask her what she hopes to accomplish with comments like that.

    Or respond with sarcastic humor, like: "Yeah, it's so nice to have a 2 year old that cooks 3 meals a day, and a 4 year old that can keep the house spotless. Once I get them to fetch my bonbons, I'll have it made. "

    Or "Gee, I don't know if it's nice or not. Why don't we ask [DH] what he thinks?"

    Answer by ss_mom at 10:24 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I just talked to my dh about it. He is on the phone yelling at her. I guess I am lucky that he knows how much I do for him and our family.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:31 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • She's just jealous. Don't take it personally. It's her issue. Don't make it your's

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:39 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I get how you would be upset by her comments. Life is to short to worry about others pettyness. Dont give her the power to bother you with her comments. { HUGGS mama }.

    Answer by augest1 at 1:03 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Jealous!

    Answer by MeggieSwan at 11:37 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

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