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6 Bumps

Would you have another baby?

So, DH and I have a DD, she's 2. We are stable financially, ect. I'm quitting work to do the stay at home thing. I'm excited and scared at the same time.

Well, I've been getting a lot of shit from my parents and inlaws about having another child.

Personally, I've talked with the hubby, he doesn't mind it, but, I really don't want another one, nor have any interest of being pregnant again. I had a really, really, REALLY rough pregnancy. I know, I know...it only lasts 9 months, but I really don't think I could or want to do it again.

We've talked about adoption too. So, that's a possibility. But, they're all gung-ho about having another biological grandchild.

DH says ignore them. But, I would really like to get the message across that I will not be getting pregnant again. But, adoption could be an option.

Answer Question
 
Chloesmom1126

Asked by Chloesmom1126 at 9:41 PM on Jan. 11, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 20 (8,269 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • If you are sure you don't want to have any more kids, your hubby can get a vasectomy. That's when my parents realized that I would not be having any more children.

    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 9:45 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • well what was rough about your pregnancy? depending on what it was, you may or may not have another bad one ... it could be a breeze
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 9:45 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Just let them know if you are adopting that they need to treat that baby with love and respect and respect your decision. I would not get pregnant just for my family wanting another grand child, lol umm definitely not
    DomoniqueWS

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 9:46 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • It is your body. It is your child to raise. It is poor manners for your parents and inlaws to pressure you into something for their own amusement. This is a huge commitment and you have a lovely child. Only children are fine...do not believe that they are always spoiled My mother was an only child and her parents could afford to do for her well and she grew up to be a selfless mother of 3. the ONLY 2 people in the world who need to make this decision for you are you and your husband. Bless you and don't feel guilty. Do not have your husband get a vasectomy until you have waited years to decide what you both would like to do.
    notjustmom213

    Answer by notjustmom213 at 9:53 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Well, my pregnancy started out with the "morning sickness"/all day all night...17 1/2 weeks. I lost 50 pounds before they decided to put me on meds....got the vomiting under control.
    Preeclampsia, swelling...it's just that flat out, I don't want to be pregnant....don't even want to chance it.

    I hated being as big a a cow lol....feeling like complete crap...
    Hated getting up every 3 hours to feed, no sleep, ect...lol Not to be rude, or mean....I did it, and managed, but do not ever want to cross that bridge again.
    Chloesmom1126

    Comment by Chloesmom1126 (original poster) at 9:53 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Not all pregnancy are the same, so you could find out that another pregnancy would be easier than the other, but on the other hand it could be just as bad. So I could understand not wanting to go through that again. Adoption is a beautiful thing, and your parents and inlaws would come around once the baby was yours. I know several people who have adopted and were reluctant themselves on whether they would love the child as their own, but now that they have the child they love him just as much and even consider adopting again.

    Good Luck!!
    ChristyW3

    Answer by ChristyW3 at 9:57 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • let me just say that is only a decision that you and your husband can make ,they dont have to go through it you do .every pregnacy is different tho so if you had a bad pregnacy the 1st time it dont mean you will have another bad one .whatever makes you happy or whatever you want then thats what i would go with .
    britme1027

    Answer by britme1027 at 9:59 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Your body, your choice! And secondly, that is between u and ur hubby ONLY! Adoption is a beautiful thing, there r so many children out there waiting for a good home to be a part of!
    PANZONSMOM

    Answer by PANZONSMOM at 10:15 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Some mothers just know they will be happy with just one. An option for you is...you could tell everyone that matters that you and your SO decided to not have any more children. It will stop them pressuring you. And you can always either go on the birth control that is the one time insert and know IF you ever have the change of heart it can be removed. Or you can do the more permanant method. With that you may want to wait a couple of years because even though there are many mothers that do not want to go through it again and DONT there are just as many who said they would not do it again but time mended their initial thoughts and they wanted another.
    AmyLynn5398

    Answer by AmyLynn5398 at 10:16 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I had good pregnancies and don't want another baby. That's your decision to make, yours and your husband's (but ultimately the nay-sayer's, at least in my opinion), not anyone else's regardless of whether they're family. If it really annoys you, you might want to have a talk with them and tell them how it makes you feel, and how it's nothing personal against them--maybe they don't realize. Otherwise, try to ignore the comments as best you can. Talk to your husband, too, just to reassure yourself that you are on the same page and you have that support system.
    DragonRiderMD

    Answer by DragonRiderMD at 10:17 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

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