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2 Bumps

I have gone to DCF, I know I am right to do so but a small part of me feels bad about it

I am the mother of 3 wonderful children 5, 8 and 11. Their father and I have been divorced for 3 years now. He has a girlfriend and they just moved in together. She has 5 children who live with them all of the time except for half the summer. My 11 year old came home from her first vistit in the new place they got together (with her 2 siblings) and told me that he place is only 3 bedrooms for 10 people. my ex and his girfriend sleep in the master bedroom , her 3 girls (6,7, and 10) have one and they will have to share my two girls so there is are 5 ,6, 7, 10 and 11 year old girls in one small (as my dd says) room. They have 2 sets of bunk beds but my dd says there isn't any room for any more beds and one set of bunkbeds covers the winow (fire hazard). So my 5 year old has to sleep on the foor. My 11 year old had the top bunk and neither of the girls with bottom bunks would switch, otherwise she said she would have given the bed to her sister, but she slept on the floor with her because she said she couldn't have a bed when her little sister didn't have one (I am so proud of my girl for the way she loves her sister). So at least one of my dd's doesn't have a bed to sleep in. Then in the boys's room my 8 year old son is in a room with a 13 and 16 year old. He sleeps on the floor because there isn't another bed, the have regular twin beds so there is not room for a third. So EOW, 2 of my children are expected to sleep on the floor. Then my son told me that at dinner the first night, he asked for seconds (my dd said they didn't put very much on his plate) and the girlfriend said "we are feeding 10 people here". My son is going through a growth spurt and is always hungry, it breaks my heart that he went hungary. I also found out that my ex and his girlfriend went out on sat night leaving my 11 (almost 12) year old dd alone in a house with 2 teenage boys who have no relation to her and who she doesn't know. There were other things too like my dds have no room to put their clothes so they have to keep their things in their bags under the bed, while the other girls each have a dresser. They were fed snack cakes and juice for breakfast both mornings and Sunday they came home to me at 4pm, none of them had showered all weekend and they hadn't had lunch because they were out all day and my ex and his girlfriend didn't want to take everyone out to lunch. I called DCF after hearing all of this. They checked out the house and talked to my children. The worker said that it was unexceptable. An order was put in place that my children are not to be in their dad's care until something is worked out. I talked to my friend who is a social worker for DCF (the one who told me to call in the first place, though I was gonna anyway of course) and she said that there is a good chance that her younger three will be sent back to live with their dad (out of state) because she can't provide for them all and the 13 and 16 year olds dad is nowhere to be found. I feel kinda bad that she might lose her children (if this happens, she will prob only see them in the summer at most) but I have to look out for my children first. I also found out that even with 5 children, she only works part time, so my ex is supporting her kids for the most part and my kids don't even have beds and my son was made to go hungry. I am just so angry

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:28 PM on Jan. 11, 2011 in General Parenting

Answers (19)
  • I'd have called too
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:32 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I would have called to, I don't blame you one bit. I would have been furious with them.
    momto4girzls

    Answer by momto4girzls at 10:38 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Holy cow...this is waaaay too long. And it needs paragraphs.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Tell them to get food stamps and quit going out to eat if there are hungry children. Or tell the bitch to not eat. That is just ridiculous. Your ex should be ashamed he let his kids be treated this way.
    bugfin

    Answer by bugfin at 10:44 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Anon, sorry about that lol I was just so upset writing this. I am a English teacher in jr. high lol
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:48 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • i would have called to since it seemed like your kids were upset
    19angie74

    Answer by 19angie74 at 10:53 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • I would have called also! I also want to comment that I am not an English teacher and know how to spell simple words like hungry (not hungary) and make complete sentences. I hope you teach better than you write.
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 11:03 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • WOW! Don't feel Bad- you not only looked out for your kids, you helped her kids too- it sounds like a unhealthy situation all the way around! Your EX's new gf sounds like a Real Winner! Your EX should of put his foot down from the Get-Go!

    daisyb

    Answer by daisyb at 11:05 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • worriedmommy600, I am a very good English teacher, tbh, it is 11pm and I didn't think I would be graded on this. Again, I wrote this when I was very upset about my children as well. I still feel there are less mistakes then most postings you see on here.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:09 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

  • Oh, and I looked at some of your comments/questions and in about 1 min I found a bunch of mistakes. Before you correct someone, why don't you make sure that you are doing things correctly.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:11 PM on Jan. 11, 2011

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