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Has anyone ever stopped you at the store and told you that you are a good parent?

So yesterday I took my daughter out for our alone time (my husband and I try to take each kid out once or twice a month for one on one time, nothing fancy in fact last night we just went shopping a few places) and we were looking through a sale rack when this woman approached me. She seemed a little older, like she'd been here, and she said to me -

"are you mom"?

I was taken a little off gaurd but I smiled and said "Yes, I am"

She smiled back and said "You are fabulous. I mean it, you are doing a really great job with her. You should be proud of yourself as a mother."

I was STUNNED! I mean, that was the highlight of my week, maybe my month! In my book there aren't many higher compliments. It got me to thinking, how often does this happen? Not often enough! It feels great to be recognized, pass the favor and empower a fellow under appreciated mother in arms. :-P

Has this ever happened to you before or have you ever recognized a strange mother working hard for her kids? Share your story!

 

P.S. Bump the post ladies, you know you want to. :-)

 
ashleyaction

Asked by ashleyaction at 7:28 AM on Jan. 12, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 16 (2,543 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Yes, a lot in fact. I get how polite and respectful he is and how I do not hesitate to punish him in public. When he was 5, I took him to a dinner theater for a Christmas play. While in the formal dining room, the waiter commented on how well behaved and polite my son was..something they rarely see. (Another child was running around while the parents ignored him). He was so impressed that he told the owner and she came out and complimented both my son and I and gave him a sundae!!! The other kid saw and started demanding one, the owner flat out told him, "If you behaved like that little boy, you would have gotten one too but you chose to run around and cause trouble, so you don't get one." I was so incredibly proud of my son.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:51 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • That's great! I wonder what it was that stood out to her?

    I was at the supermarket once with my toddler and he was getting fussy and antsy and started trying to get out of his seat in the cart. There was an older woman in line ahead of us and she said "Oh you guys go ahead of me," and I said "Oh thank you, but but he has to learn that he needs to wait." She was sort of shocked and she said "You know you're right! Good for you!" she then went on about it for a while. It was nice, she didn't say I was fabulous, but she let me know that I stood out in her mind some how.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 7:34 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • i havent been stopped at a store but my new neighbors came to me when i got home the one day and told me how polite, respectful and helpful my kids were. :) they had just moved in and were building a patio out back and both my kids volunteered themselves to help.

    JOR_HAIL

    Answer by JOR_HAIL at 7:34 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • and kudos to you!!! and your daughter!
    JOR_HAIL

    Answer by JOR_HAIL at 7:35 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Great stories! I don't even know what I did! LOL! My daughter is little and she wanted this pack of silly bands (which are kind of the devil, lol) and she was fussing with them. She finally decided that she needed to open them so she PUT THE PACK IN HER MOUTH and tryed to open it. I calmly took them away and told her she was about done with them. She looked at me and asked "why?". I told her in a kind of matter of fact way that I took them away because she was absuing the privelage to hold them. I said that she had put them in her mouth and next time we went shopping she'd get another chance to act like a girl that was big enough to carry around her own silly bands.

    It seemed silly. It's how I always treat her. I try to have enough patience but sometimes it's hard and it feels pointless. Not yesterday though, yesterday it made me feel like a king! :-)
    ashleyaction

    Comment by ashleyaction (original poster) at 7:40 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • As I got older I started to enjoy those few and far between compliments but when I had my first few it was always so condescending. "You're doing SO well for such a young mother". I mean I don't think they took into account that I was married and was living in a stable home with a stable family, all that mattered to them was that I was under the age of 20. It all felt too much like they were treating me like a toddler. I used to smile politely and take them though, because I mean it's better than no compliment at all!
    leah_rai

    Answer by leah_rai at 7:42 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Leah, I get that too. I had my first when I was twenty. I don't think it's ever a compliment when someone says you are doing well... considering... That's different though, if someone tells you that you are doing well for being so young that's like- HEY, what about not considering my age?!?! I hate that, people used to tell me my daughter was so smart considering her special needs, and it was like - piss off. Thank you but no thank you for making me feel worse kind of thing. I am sorry that people do that, sometimes people are too niave to "get it". I am a step mother too and sometimes people I know make comments about how I do well considering my step child isn't actually mine. I get pretty offended by that too, she is mine. Long rant shorter-> I get what you're saying. It's like an apology that ends with "but... it's just an insult wrapped in sugar.
    ashleyaction

    Comment by ashleyaction (original poster) at 7:48 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Last winter my friend and I went into a gas station for slushies (she was pregnant with her second and CRAVING one) We both took our little boys with us. When we got into the gas station an old lady stopped us and told us what good moms we were because we didn't leave our kids in the car LOL. Who would do that anyway?!
    Misteh

    Answer by Misteh at 8:27 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Yes..once in Wal Mart actually.. My daughter was acting like a total BRAT while we were in the check out line. Grabbing things she knew she shouldn't, talking back, ect.. I looked her in the eye and I told her that if she could not behave I am putting this barbie doll back on the shelf so that a better behaved little girl could take it home with her instead. Less than a minute later she was back at it again. So.. we got up to the register and I took the barbie doll and told the cashier that we were NOT buying it because Heather (my DD) was not behaving herself or listening to mommy. An older woman behind me tapped me on the shoulder as we were about to leave and told me that if more parents would follow through with what they said they were going to do like I did there would be alot of better behaved children in this world.
    Ctink8189

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 8:47 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • All the time. And I am always embarassed by the attention. So is my son. We either get stopped to hear hoe cute/beautiful he is or what a great mom I am. Here is the deal: no parent is perfect and no child is perfect. This is why I hate being commented on. The last comment was how wonderful it was to hear a parent talk to her child the way I was talking to my four year old. I was telling him, while in line, when I was little we didn't have tooth brushes that sang songs. He couldn't believe it. I get talking to my child was sweet for this older woman....but there really are parents who do this every day. People zone in on us more than most because we are different ethnicities. I suspect if we "matched" the compliments would decrease. I also have parents who see us and ask for tips and advice. While that is nice, that also gets old. I teach parents for a living how to parent differently....
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:21 AM on Jan. 12, 2011

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