Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

4 Bumps

how do i get my own personal free time?

My husband and his friends assume that since I gave birth to all the kids and i am a stay at home mom anyway that i dont need free time and i dont need to be leaving the house without the kids. I never ever get any time to myself unless my amazing aunt will take the kids. I never really complain too much to anyone because I love my kids but I do feel that i need space of my own. a need a hobby without the kids. Its rare, very very rare that i do anything without the kids.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:40 PM on Jan. 12, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (14)
  • Sounds like you need to have a good sit down with your husband and tell him how you feel.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 12:41 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • You do need to talk to your husband. Then join a gym, belong to a bookclub, go to a spa, something just for you. and have your husband help you arrange it somehow with the kids, or if they are old enough to be in school....use THAT time FOR YOU!!!!! You way deserve it girl!
    laur1963

    Answer by laur1963 at 12:44 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • This is between you and hubby, not his friends. I think you need to talk to hubby at a time when you arent upset about it. tell him you need a little time that is just yours. Do you want a set time to go do something specific? It may be easiest if thursday night is your night. You may even have to do it every other week. This could be your time to go shopping, meet a friend...do as you wish ALONE. Talk to hubby baout how important it is to you. If he wont watch the kids then you may have to hire a babysitter.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 12:47 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • My husband is the same way and the way I get and the only way I get quiet time is to do the food shopping while the girls are in school and him at home. HIs days off are sunday, monday, and tuesday. That is the only time besides husband at work and kids at school. Men just do not understand we need time as well. I can not even talk to him about it since does no good. So I just make shopping and grabbing lunch one day a week my day.
    momindiana

    Answer by momindiana at 12:50 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Ah, the age-old question. I say: "Run like the wind Bullseye!" -LOL (*Before some of you get your panties in a bunch- this was a joke! I am not promoting running away from your family- except for maybe an hour at a time- & grocery shopping doesnt count!)
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 12:51 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Actually the only way you will get time to yourself is if you work it into your schedule and be consistent with it so they realize that you need to have some time for you and make them believe that you will be a better Mom for having that time to unwind and refresh from all that you are responsible for doing during the day.
    CafeMochaMom1

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 12:59 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • You tell your DH that you are going out some night, and he's staying home with the kids. :) :)

    KairisMama

    Answer by KairisMama at 3:03 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • Bingo KairisMama.
    jewjewbee

    Answer by jewjewbee at 4:23 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • First hubby needs to do his share by shoving you out hte door even if its just to so shopping get your hair done whatever. I hardly ever feel like doing anything when my hubby makes me have time, but I feel revitalized after I do.
    nikkitorres

    Answer by nikkitorres at 4:27 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

  • I would tell your hubby that for evertime he goes out without the kids, you get to too. Being a stay at home mom to children IS a full time job, only its not just 9-5 mon-fri, it's 24/7 with no sick days
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 5:07 PM on Jan. 12, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN