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Should Grandparents be allowed to adopt grandkids?

My parents were divorced and with other people by the time I was 6. My real mom signed over gaurdianship to her parents by the time I was 3 so that my real dad couldn't take me from her. At 6 it went to court on who would get custody of me. My dad had a step son and two kids by then, but he was still there to try to get me, my mother who lived two states away was there to get me, and my grandparents that had raised me until then were there to get me. The final decision was that my grandparents got to raise me. What are your feelings about Grandparents adopting their grandkids? I think unless there is something way wrong with the parents raising the kids, the grandparents shouldn't be allowed to.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:54 PM on Nov. 12, 2008 in Adoption

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I think it depends on the situation. Not all grandparents should raise their grandchildren and some grandparents are very capable of raising their grandchildren. It is not so cut and dry. Each situation has to be looked at from various angles. But its the same with biological parents. Should every person capable of reproducing raise that child? Some are more than capable and some shouldn't be aloud to copulate much less raise a child.

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:04 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • I have no problem with it. Some parents were never meant to be parents. It seems that a lot of children now are being raised by their grandparents. Due to early pregnancy/drugs/leaving etc...
    I don't see why anyone would object for a grandparent to adopt.

    Answer by kscmbz at 3:57 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • If the parents are deceased or unable to take care of their own kids, then I think grandparents should be able to adopt them. By unable, I mean if they are unfit, in and out of prison, endangering the child with abuse or drugs, etc. I tdon't think it's ok for the grandparents to just sweep in and take the kids if there is no reason.

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 3:58 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • I'm not sure I understand your question. Your parents were obviously not considered the best choice by a court of law, according to what I am understanding. So, who would you have made the decision that the parents are unfit? If your mother signed her parental rights away, did your father? Or was he just absent? I'm not meaning to be harsh, but if both parents have basically signed away or given up their rights by being absent, and the grandparents (or any family member) has been caring for the child, a court is going to take that into account.

    Answer by KnoxvilleDoula at 4:02 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • I think the thing that's wrong in your story is that your mother was able to give you to your grandparents to stop your father from getting custody of you. That shouldn't be allowed. I'm guessing the court figured your grand parents had been parenting you for 3 years you'd want to stay with them. Since your father was deemed capable of raising the 3 kids he had, it does sound like you should have gone to him. Yep, I agree with you it doesn't seem right.


    Answer by onethentwins at 4:32 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • as long as they are capable, and the parents are uncapable i see no problem with it.

    Answer by jbirchard at 4:42 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • I was raised by my grandparents. My mother left me with them at 3 mo. old. I was never formally adopted by them but probably should have been. My father was not an available choice due to being disabled in a car accident. Not only did my mother not physically care for me the majority of my life, but she never paid my grandparents one cent to support me. As a young child (& even as a young adult) I never fully understood why I was not living with my mother. Now I am older I do understand it was best. I see nothing wrong with grandparents raising grandkids if there is no other option but like Twins said, it sound like your mom just did it to keep you from your dad...then it appears to have backfired on her when she couldnt just get you back.

    Answer by lisa89j at 6:53 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • i know in illinois grandparents have as much rights to grandchildren as parents do

    Answer by shannonmarie759 at 8:27 PM on Nov. 12, 2008

  • I would have a problem with anyone adopting a child from under fit parents like that. I don't think it has anything to do with grandparents, I think it has to do with a pair of crooked people willing to play games with a child's life. I think, normally, when grandparents adopt children its to keep them as a part of the family and let them know their natural parents better...and to keep up a similar life as what they were used to.

    Answer by kabbot01 at 2:57 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Yes, Grandparents should be allowed. However, as a couple of pp said, they should not be given preference over the parents if the parents are fit to raise the child.


    Answer by older_mom at 10:08 AM on Nov. 13, 2008