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Okay well...

I asked a question yesterday on whether or not I should wait for my ex to give me an answer if we should be together. I asked him flat out yesterday, Do you want us to be together because I do. I don't want to wait for you to make up you're mind because if you really want to be with me you would. Well he said that he didn't know if he wanted to be in a relationship right now but he loves me and he wants a life with me in the future. wtf does that mean? Hold my breath until he calls? I told him that I'm not waiting around for anyone so i'll just consider us not getting back together and I should just get over him. He said he'll text me later and I just said please don't. I've cut off any contact I had with him personally but we do have to stay in touch since we have a kid together. I don't know what the future holds but I feel better knowing not to hold out for him anymore. What can I do to get my mind off of him?
P.S. finding someone new to get over him is not my style.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:44 PM on Jan. 13, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Find something else to do, instead. Something that doesn't involve dating. Volunteer. Take a class. Start an exercise program. Anything YOU would like to do to make yourself feel better, and if it contributes to your community, all the better! That's when the good guys show up, you know... when you're involved in other things.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:47 PM on Jan. 13, 2011

  • I think you are right to not wait for him although you never know. My DH and I dated in college and when he turned 21 he said see ya later, I was younger and could not go out to clubs and that sort of thing. Well I went my way and he went his, we saw each other some because we had mutual friends. I eventually dated someone else and ended up getting pregnant. When I was he started coming around again and after the baby was born he stayed. After a year of being friends and hanging out, we ended up getting back together, getting married and have been together for 13 years.

    So I guess what I am saying is don't wait around although you never know how life is going to work. Try and find things to do like work or a hobby or something like that.

    Good Luck!
    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 1:48 PM on Jan. 13, 2011

  • I would just move on in your life and not wait for him. You don't need to find someone else you already have a child who needs your time and you need to find what you want in life just like your ex is doing. Maybe you two will come back to each other or maybe you will be single for a while and eventually meet someone who is ready to be with you for life. I would just have some fun and build a new life for yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:59 PM on Jan. 13, 2011

  • Don't try so hard to get over him if you are not ready. Let the process unfold naturally. If u both shared a meaningful relationship at one point then feelings arent just gonna go away overnight. I dont know why you separated or other issues causing that but based on my own experience I can tell u that wanting to be with someone sometimes isnt enough. When u say "if you really want to be with me u would", it's not that simple. I'm married to a military man who I adore however right now we cant be together. Military duty has affected our relationship and seems as if being together is bringing us more grief than joy. Sometimes we have to love people enough to let them go. We cant hold each other hostage. Im still commited to him but need time alone to recollect myself. Have you stopped being the person he fell in love with?Dont bring up the relationship everytime u talk either. Let him make decisions for him. But dont give up..
    ija

    Answer by ija at 2:07 PM on Jan. 13, 2011

  • well just go out with your friends have a night out or spend some time with you mom go a funny movie go to a spa or just go shopping with your child have mommy & baby time go to the park
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 10:16 PM on Jan. 13, 2011

  • Don't find someone new to get over someone...doesn't really work. However, find your support group - family, friends - and go out places, make playdates for your child. Do special mommy dates with your little one. You'll do just fine!
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 11:40 PM on Jan. 13, 2011

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