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How can I get my husband to go on a budget with me?

My DH makes the money, and I stay at home. He has the bank card, with the money on it, with him all the time. If he wants to buy something, and the money is in the bank, he will buy it....not thinking ahead to bills and groceries. So, even though he makes more than enough money, we always live paycheck to paycheck. It is very frustrating! I've made up budgets before, and he looks at them and says "Yeah, thats a great idea!" But then, it never gets started. I'm starting to feel like he's blowing me off.. like when my kids say "Mommy, look at me!" and they are doing something they've done a million times, and I say "Thats great, honey!"
Have any of you had to deal with this? How did you get on the same page with your DH?

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Asked by brandyj at 12:37 PM on Jan. 14, 2011 in Relationships

Level 21 (10,228 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I would tell him that making and sticking to a budget is important, and that it will put you 'money ahead' and not be paycheck to paycheck. I think he should be told that his random spending is not a good thing it is cutting into the household budget. I would seriously think about putting him on an allowance and setting up a 2nd account and putting the majority of the money in there, and using that as the bills/household account, and use his current account for his 'allowance'. Every payday give him $x for his spending BUT that has to cover gas, lunches, and whatever and it has to last until next payday. (oh and do not give him a bank card or access to the household account).

    Answer by MizLee at 12:51 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • My husband and I keep separate accounts and divide up the bills-- so I don't have that problem.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:51 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • My husband and I have always had a budget, from the days when we had no money to now. We discuss that budget every payday. We have the best results in times when we keep an exta checking account in my name only. We determined how much money I need to run and stock the household (he pays all the bills). Every payday I deposit that amount in the separate account, which is in my name only because I'm the only one who buys groceries and household supplies. Each of us also has a budgeted "allowance" but it we go over it we are each accountable for working it out with the budget responsibilities we hold. If I overspend my allowance, I have to figure out what will be missing from the fridge/freezer/pantry, etc. If he overspends he....well...he either stiffs savings for that little bit or makes up for it the next payday. But I have to say, he's really the good one with money. I am the one that sometimes overspends my allowance.

    Answer by misses_nick at 1:10 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • easy. tell him if he keeps spending money everything will be shut off and you wont be able to pay rent. haha. it finally got through my husbands brain. im in charge of all the money though. he trusts me. because im good at it.

    Answer by bouncingsoul at 1:14 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I would figure out how much the household bills are and when he gets paid, take that amount out of his account and put it in a separate account for household bills. It would be a good idea to also put a certain amount in savings. Either that, or start using cash only, no debit cards. I've found that if I don't have my debit card and only a certain amount of cash, I really think about purchases and whether or not I really need what I'm looking at.
    My dh and I have always been on a budget. When we were both working we lived on his paycheck only and saved all of mine, so it wasn't a big deal when I quit work to stay home.

    Answer by missanc at 1:46 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

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