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2 Bumps

Is it acceptable to list the actual mother and the step-mother of the groom as 'Co-Mothers'?

My son and his fiance have a wedding web page. On it they list me (real mother) and his step-mother (who sees him once a year on Thanksgiving) as 'Co-Mothers'. I'm upset about it. Should I be?

Answer Question
 
katzmutti

Asked by katzmutti at 4:23 PM on Jan. 14, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 4 (44 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Depends on how long she's been in his life. If not very long I would be upset.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:26 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I think he is doing what he thinks is respectful to both of you and no I wouldn't be upset about it. Now, I had a friend who's dd just got married and her dd didn't even acknowledge her she only address the step mom in all speeches it was despicable.


    But like I said I think kids have a hard time when they have to do their invites to their weddings when there are "steps" involved they do the best they can so I would just let it be. I don't think he was doing it out of disrespect. My dd also has a step family and I know that I will be ok with what she decides for her wording of her wedding invites.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:30 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • Id be upset. I think it is in bad form and etiquette wedding wise to do that. Generally you just list your mother and father (whether you like them or not) because they are the parents.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 4:41 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I wouldn't like that term "co-mothers". It's simply mother and step mother.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:02 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • That's a horrible term and NOT correct. There is a Mother and a STEP Mother and NOT CO-mothers.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 8:15 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • It depends 100% on YOU. YOU are the mother, not her. YOU should have been asked about it first. I would talk to you son and say you don't remember her carrying half the pregnancy or suffering through half the labor. The apropriate thing in a wedding with a step mother is to ask the mother if she is willing, at to what extend , to share their role, if not then the step mother just shows and sits by the that father or in the second row (that is up to the bride and groom)
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 11:31 AM on Jan. 15, 2011

  • i'd be pissed! she sees him once a year? did she raise him? thats the only reason i could see anyone using this term. i'd let my son know up front how upset i was.
    lillie70

    Answer by lillie70 at 12:24 PM on Jan. 15, 2011

  • It's THEIR wedding and maybe HE feels like his step-mother is like a mother to him and HE wanted to acknowledge that TO HIM both you and she have had a hand in making him the man he is today. YOU don't have a say in it and if you are upset that is YOUR issue. It's HIS wedding.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:36 AM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • It's THEIR wedding and maybe HE feels like his step-mother is like a mother to him and HE wanted to acknowledge that TO HIM both you and she have had a hand in making him the man he is today. YOU don't have a say in it and if you are upset that is YOUR issue. It's HIS wedding.


     REally she sees him once a year, how much did she have to do with his BECOMING the man he is today.  It was probably his DAD wanting the acknowldgement of his current wife.

    PestPatti

    Answer by PestPatti at 9:42 AM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • When you asked your son about this, what was his response?
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 3:47 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

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