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do you make your kids write thank you notes?

I'm not AGAINST them at all, but while my parents always made sure we gave proper thank yous, thank you notes were considered impersonal.

we gave hugs instead, or phone calls to those far away.

my grandparents always felt bad for those that would go on about their Thank you notes, they preferred the hugs or the songs that we would sing in return.

once when I was about 7, I saw a package on the porch with my name on it(spelled wrong, but figured it was me). it was in January. (right after the holidays)
when my mom got home, I asked her 'who is aunt so and so, and why is she sending me all these Thank you notes?'

I thought it was a odd gift, but still apreciated anything I got in the mail. it just seemed weird. that and I wondered why my mom and grandmother got so irritated by it.
Turned out that Aunt so and so sent them to get me to send her thank you notes.

I didn't know about the gifts because I didn't see them, she kept sending me engraved things with my name spelled wrong. very touchy subject with me.
She'd been told many times by my grandmother what the correct spelling was, and had written it down.

not saying that gifts shouldn't be appreciated, of course. but my mom and grandmother were trying to keep from upsetting me, which I understand.

I like getting thank you notes, but I don't think they should be a requirement.
maybe that's just me, as long as appreciation is passed along, that's ok by me.


Asked by Anonymous at 7:18 PM on Jan. 14, 2011 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • No, I don't. I think that saying thank you, or a phone call, email, fine. Although I appreciate thank you notes, I get irritated at people who expect them and get upset when they don't receive them....these people have control issues and I don't believe in catering to people's control issues....

    Answer by Anna92464 at 7:23 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I insist on my children writing them. It's a base upon which to build and when they are old and don't want to, fine. But I appreciate thank you notes and hate to see proper etiquette become a thing of the past. I make my sons write eve for birthday parties. I think calls are good too but for our family, it's notes.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 7:20 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I buy blank notecards and let my children draw pictures on them and write thank you's or other greetings! This personalizes the card and is still the proper method of expressing thanks to those who you are not face-to-face with. We often call immediately to say thank you, but the card is always in the mail within a week.

    Answer by misses_nick at 7:37 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • Certain people in my family liked thank you notes so I had the kids write to them. Others liked phone calls, so they got a phone call.. One wanted both a call and a note but I said one or the other!!

    Answer by elizabr at 7:23 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I do write them on her behalf since she's to little to but if not a note then def. a call. I always have found that a thank you goes a long way

    Answer by genagina at 7:28 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • yes, i do. he's a great writer and artist..and the older folk love getting cards from a 5yo.

    Answer by dullscissors at 7:43 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • Yeah, we always send them.

    Answer by MommyH2 at 7:45 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • we make thank you pictures. the kids draw pictures and then i write thank yous to them and send them

    Answer by knagsmom at 8:34 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • I did when they were younger, now they do it on their own.

    Answer by elliecooper at 8:47 PM on Jan. 14, 2011

  • No

    Answer by khf22 at 9:37 PM on Jan. 14, 2011