Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My MIL is a Christian Scientist. How should we approach this situation with her? (posted in the health questions too)

She believes that God will heal her and does not believe in modern day medicine. She has not seen a doctor in 46 years (since my DH was born). Despite her religion, she has been smoking since she was a teenager. She's been having difficulties walking from one end of the house to the other because she gets so out of breath. She can't clean house anymore or work in the garden. My FIL said that he thinks she will die within a year. Even if she did have emphysema or cancer she wouldn't go see a doctor.



My FIL, DH and I are not Christian Scientists, in fact I was in the medical profession. It's difficult knowing that someone you care about could get medical help, but doesn't want it. Is there anyone who can give us some insight as to how to deal with this?

Answer Question
 
sweetpeasmom1

Asked by sweetpeasmom1 at 11:59 PM on Nov. 12, 2008 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 3 (27 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • sadly i dont see God curing her from that... i am a smoker as well so i am not bashing that... but she is putting poision inside her body (temple) and God says not to alter your temple or something along those lines....

    it is very scary and sad when someone you care about doesn't listen to you when all you want is good for them. Maybe show her sites online of what a smokers lung looks like..... she needs to be seen...she could have cancer... my moms friend died of breast cancer and never knew she had it. she would never go to the doctor and when someone finally conveniced her, they told her it was a syct she siad it was nothing and never went again... about a month later she died... and then they found out she has cancer.

    i would just pray for her.... seeing as tho she is a grown woman you cant force her....i hope for the best....hopefully its not already to late
    JuLiAnSmOmMy317

    Answer by JuLiAnSmOmMy317 at 12:29 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • God can cure anything, but i also beleive that we pay for the wrong doing that we have done after we got saved, And i would rather pay for it here than when I die. But you could also tell her (I believe) that the Lord work's through Dr's, he give's them the knoledge to help us. But more than likely she is not going to listen because she believes God will see her through, and it might not be what u want but it might just be her time. He has a plan for all of us and when we r done with our purpose, than it's our time!!
    supermomof924

    Answer by supermomof924 at 12:52 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Pray for her!!!
    supermomof924

    Answer by supermomof924 at 12:52 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • even if you get her to a doc, I really doubt she would authorize any treatments.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:59 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Without her going to a doctor, to see what her diagnosis and prognosis might be (even if she's not willing to do treatment), there is no saying what might be wrong to even know how to make her more comfortable or to help her get better if it is possible. I mean, it could be anything from emphysema to COPD to lung cancer to something completely and utterly unrelated.

    In my experience, there's not much you can do--I have an aunt, similar situation to yours, though she wasn't Christian Scientist, that unfortunately died as a result of her decision...but in her mind, that was God's Will...

    thalassa

    Answer by thalassa at 4:27 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • I would talk to her, if she is at least willing to face the fact that something is wrong, maybe she would at least see what it is that is wrong--for your sakes? That would give you all at least some idea of what you are dealing with, and if it is something bad, the severtity and timeframe involved.

    In my aunts case (not to make you think this is the worst case scenario before you know anything for sure, but...), the family guilted her into going to the doctor's--not for any sort of treatment--but just for a diagnosis, so that we were better equiped to help her and to prepare for what might happen and so that we could stop worrying about all the million things that could potentially be the problem, and focus on the one thing that was...which let us be better able to make things easier for her, and let us know that it was necessary for us to say our good-bye's and make preparations for her passing.
    thalassa

    Answer by thalassa at 4:27 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Have you tried telling her that God gave doctor's the knowledge necessary for their jobs. A "God gives us the tools it is up to us to use them" explanation of it. It's like the following story.
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 7:49 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • A devout Christian heard an urgent news report on his radio that a flash flood was within minutes of entering the peaceful valley where he lived. Immediately he went to his knees and prayed for safety. The words were still on his lips when he became aware that water was gushing under his door. He retreated to the second floor and finally onto the roof of his house.
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 7:49 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • While he sat on the roof, a helicopter flew by and the pilot asked over the loudspeaker if they could lift him off. Its not necessary since I have the Lords protection, he replied.
    Moments later the house began to break up and he found himself clinging to a tree. A police boat, braving the waters, approached him for rescue, but he assured them that the Lord would save him. Finally, the tree gave way and the man went to his death.
    Standing before the Lord, he asked, Lord, Im glad to be here, but why didnt You answer my prayer for safety?
    The Lord responded, Son, I told you over the radio to get out of there Then I sent you a helicopter and a motor boat!
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 7:49 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Love the helicopter and motor boat story, but let me tell you about the other end of it. I have a MIL who will take every drug possible to stay alive even though she is miserable every single day. Except for the stupidity of smoking, your MIL has more trust and dignity than mine, as she is willing to let go and let God. Normal of course lies somewhere in the middle. It would be nice if she would at least find out what is wrong with her so you know if she is simply going to be a burden for the next several years or if she really is going to check out on you within the year. Ask her if she wants to know what God's plan for her life is. Maybe simple curiosity will work in your favor.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:32 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN