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i will do any thing to get him back

i love my husband and would do anything to save our marriage i made a mistake and cheated and tryed to make up for it it wasnt panned he threw me out & said he was divorceing me iwent to a friend i thought i stoped b4 it went to far he filed for a divorce but says hes not sure what he wants i hurt him and doesnt know if he can love again but we still spend time together our teenage son i feel is stopping us from getting back together he still has feelings and cares for me what do i do to save my 16 yr marriage

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ladiebo

Asked by ladiebo at 2:08 AM on Nov. 13, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • U can just throw away 16 years... He is extremely hurt, and I know u must be too... I would not sign the d. papers and just try to mend things again. He will want to see if he can trust you. Just keep spending time with him. That right there does give you the knowledge that he hasn't given up. Try to be patient and always express you true feelings. I hope all goes well hun.
    mrsfarris

    Answer by mrsfarris at 4:28 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Wow, to cheat after 16 years....that is what is keeping you and your DH apart, not your child. Your son is probably going to be very resentful of you for a long time....and rightfully so, you are no longer someone to look up to in his eyes. You are going to have to work very hard to earn the trust back from both of your men (DH and DS). Do not place the blame on anyone else, it was your mistake and it is fully your responsibility to correct it. Try family counseling and couples counseling so that you can all work out your issues with one another.
    Kimebs

    Answer by Kimebs at 7:15 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • I'd say you have some work to do. In books that discuss cheating they refer to statistics showing that if a man cheats a w is more willing to forgive and fight for the marriage but if a woman cheats the h isn't likely to forgive and the divorce rate is very high. I"m not saying it's impossible to save the marriage but there would be some major trust issues and a long road of counseling.. In your defense, if you thought the marriage was over anyway (his threatening to divorce you) then it's like police entrapment, he/they "caused" the situation to be such that you did something you normally would not have done but- for what HE did. Men shouldn't make women think there is no hope and make them turn to someone else for comfort.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:09 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • some ppl can tforgive cheating...others cant. you stabbed a knife into that trust and it may never heal. if he isnt the forgiving type...get over it.
    moki1984

    Answer by moki1984 at 10:27 AM on Nov. 13, 2008

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