I have seen serveral posts on here in the past few weeks about step mothers complaining about their step children. It seems that in most cases, it is driving a wedge between the child and their parent. I feel that if you marry someone, you have to accept their children and the situation or agreement for the children that the parents have made, if you can't, don't marry them. A step mother doesn't have the right to drive a wedge between father and child, it is just cruel. I have even seen step moms on here saying that they have told the step child that they are not welcome in their home. Until that child is 18, that home is their home too. Just as parents can't kick their 13 year old out onto the street, a step mom can't tell a child they are not welcome in their home. I believe (I saw this posted under one of these questions) that this could be considered abandonment and the step parent and parent doing this can lose custody of the child in question but also any other children they have. It just makes me so angry seeing these kinds of posts, if you aren't ready to be a step mother, meaning accepting the child NO MATTER WHAT. don't marry someone with a child. Breaking up families and causing problems in families is wrong, accept the situation the way it is or move on. Am I wrong for this?
Of course cases where the step child is dangerous to other children or the parents, that is different, but I am talking about normal children with normal behavioral issues for their age.
Answer by boobarandbell at 3:27 PM on Jan. 18, 2011
Answer by tyfry7496 at 3:00 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
Answer by Nanixh at 3:23 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 3:28 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
Answer by lilma0608 at 3:31 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 3:13 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
I don't think your wrong in the instances you've stated. There are some children that will just not except another mom or dad because they want their own parents to go back together. It's hurtful to them and they don't really understand so love and patience will go along way. When you wed anyone that has children, you wed the whole family or don't do it at all.
Answer by zbee at 3:02 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
Answer by pinkdragon36 at 3:03 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
Answer by soon2bmmy at 5:03 PM on Jan. 16, 2011
zbee, I agree to part of that but I don't think that a child should have to accept a step parent as a parent just to be treated like family in the home.
No nor do I. I didn't even imply that, I was saying for those that don't like the step child, patience and love can at least make a better relationship. You can't replace a parent in some cases and in others the kids like the step parent better, all depends on the dynamics of the people involved. Just keep things as pleasant as possible is what I was saying.
Answer by zbee at 6:17 PM on Jan. 16, 2011