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4 Bumps

My 17 year old daughter lied to me

My daughter told me she slept at her friends house... I get a phone call in the morning by her friends mother, that the girls didnt come home. why did she tell me in the morning.. I dont know.. I asked both girls where they were last night.. neither one will tell me... I want to know where she was last night... any one help...

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Laura G.

Asked by Laura G. at 4:49 PM on Jan. 16, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 2 (8 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Check cell phone history when you have a chance. You might never find out where she was, but what was done is done. You can only handle the future, and I'd start with losing her cell phone if she has one, and no more overnights! EVER!
    SandyHack

    Answer by SandyHack at 4:51 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • I would say that warrants a drug test. Go right now to the pharmacy and buy one (dont tell her) and have her pee in a cup. Her phone is now yours and she looses privileges until she tells you and then you can decide what the punishment will be.

    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 4:53 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • If I would have pulled that crap with my mom or aunt, they would have kicked my butt! She may be 17, but she is still living under your roof and has to live by your rules. I would take whatever is most important to her away and demand she tells me where she has been! I would restrict her quite a bit. She needs to learn that you are not going to just let this one go. It a big no no. Good luck!
    amber1330

    Answer by amber1330 at 4:55 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • well I imagine somewhere there was a party last night. I would trick her into telling you. Tell her that you already know where she was bc so and so saw her...she needs to tell u the truth or her punishment is going to be worse...when does she turn 18? I dont know if that will work. You can always take her car. that worked on me.
    LuvMyMedic3ID

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 4:56 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • Maybe the girls snuck out after mom went to bed. At least she notified you. If my dd did that she would be so grounded till she told me where they were and I could verify it with another adult, a bank statement or a cell phone record.
    beyondhopes

    Answer by beyondhopes at 4:56 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • While the suggestions that have been given may work, they wouldn't have for me because I didn't actually care enough about cell phones and all that. I would sit her down, before taking anything, and calmly talk to her. Kids typically respond better to adults acting like adults and not just going nuts on them. Tell her that you understand that she's 17 and so close to being a legal adult, etc., but she's still you're daughter and that will never change. Tell her that you just want to know that she was in a safe place and wasn't doing anything illegal that could cause her harm. Tell her that even if she was drinking or at a party, you want to know and DON'T go off on her if she tells you where she was and stuff! Stay calm and just talk about it. Tell her what you think about it, etc. Obviously, if that didn't work, you could just take privileges until she cracks or turns 18 lol.
    Mrs.BAT

    Answer by Mrs.BAT at 5:02 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • If she has a cell just call the company and ask them for the call history. If its in your name youre entitled to it. Tell her you are going to do it (even if you dont) and she will tell you.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:18 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • She was with her boyfriend I guarentee it. Her friend was also with her boyfriend, more then likely one of the boyfriend's parents are out of town so they all stayed at that house
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 5:55 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • This is coming from my 17 yr old daughter's mouth and I quote

    "take her phone, her computer, and no overnights until she tells you wehre she was, because I guarantee that if she's refusing to tell you where she was- it was somewhere she was NOT supposed to be doing things she shouldn't have been doing, because if she wasn't she would have told you"

    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 6:15 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

  • how did my answer get a freaking downvote?

    Honestly- I agree with Mrs.Bat that should be first (and so does my daughter) BUT...if talking doesn't work then start taking things away.
    I just thought that some input from and actual 17 yr old girl might be of interest here.
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 6:21 PM on Jan. 16, 2011

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