Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

4 Bumps

Are all men like this, or just mine?

You try to tell him something important, but he doesn't take you seriously, because are a woman?

Our car has been having a little trouble here for awhile, making grinding noises. Hasn't been too loud or too bad until this past week. I told him earlier in the week that it had gotten worse, the grinding was really loud. He brushed it, didn't take me seriously. Never once went to check the car out. Yesterday we were supposed to go somewhere to meet his family in town. We pulled out of the driveway, he heard the grinding and said "Ummm, we're not going anywhere." Uhh really? I've only been telling him all week that the car was worse. *sigh*

So his mom came and got us (and we had to remove our son's carseat from our car--and I had that sucker installed during a carseat safety check a few months back--hope I can get it again just as tight), took us to get brakes and rotors so he can hopefully get them put on the car BEFORE I'm supposed to go to my son's parent-teacher conference later.

This is not the only time he's brushed off something I've told him. Just wondering if it's just my man that does it or if anyone else have to put up with that kind of thing too. Is it something about being a woman that makes men take us less seriously?


Asked by thatgirl70 at 11:19 AM on Jan. 17, 2011 in Relationships

Level 27 (29,531 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (25)
  • It's all men honey, there doesn't seem to be one that knows how to take a woman seriously especially when it comes to cars.

    Answer by ranthony7692 at 11:21 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I don't know, I tell my man something and he's all ears....especially if its something concerning the car or anything important. He goes checks it right away.

    Answer by LynnB1 at 11:23 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • Nope, mines not like that. My Hubby checks our vehicles before he leaves for the month. He does all the oil changes, reg maintenance on a schedule. He keeps a notebook in his shop with each vehicles miles and last maintenance.. He doesn't wait until something goes bad, he takes care of it so the problem doesn't happen.

    Maybe suggest to your Hubby that if he keeps track of the things that get done on it that it will give him and idea when it needs to be looked at. Also when I hear something I will tell my Hubby, and then he will suggest what I need to do to remedy it before he gets home. I'm always willing to help any way I can, and that takes the burden off of him.
    My Hubby looks at it this way, he would rather us be safe in our vehicles, and not run the risk of an accident, or breakdown, then we will have bigger problems... If he knew your Hubby he would probably smack him upside the head for not taking care of his family.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 11:30 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • You not the only one. I can also suggest something and he just blow off. Then a few week later he suggest it like it is his great idea. I think that it irks them that it is coming fom us women. lol

    Answer by nicjon at 11:22 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • Yeah he blows me off all of the time and it sucks when I am right and we find out later.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 11:22 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I mean he "blows it off "as it is nothing sorry

    Answer by nicjon at 11:23 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • Generally, this can be attributed to differences in communication styles, rather than who it is saying whatever it is. Some women are better at formulating messages that men can hear... some are worse.

    Men, typically, don't want the Whole Story. They want the plot synopsis (with explosions, if possible). So, while you tell the story of where you were driving, who was in the car, what was on the radio and what the weather was like, he checked out of the discussion around about the first road you mention...

    If, on the other hand, you take a more manly approach to the conversation: Honey, I need you to come and listen to the weird noise the car is making... or The car is making an expensive-sounding grinding noise... or What makes a car sound like a meat grinder?

    It is how much extraneous, irrelevant and contextualizing detail we add to the front end of a story that makes men fall asleep before the end.

    Just the facts, ma'am.

    Answer by LindaClement at 11:24 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I think they don't have to driveit ,so they don't think about it. When they have to drive it then something is wrong with. As if a light bulb goes off. I always get the phone book out and start looking up auto repairs. I make sure he is near when I am doing this. He always ask what are looking for? I tell him I am looking for someone to repair my car. If I can't fix it I am going to have to pay someone to fix it. Suddenly he goes outside to see if he might able to fix it.  GoodLuck!!!


    Answer by sheer_heart at 11:25 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • They only have attention spans for what interests them. For my husband if I'm talking about something that interests me he usually doesn't listen. If I'm reporting details to him he doesn't listen. Not because he doesn't need to know, but because it doesn't interest him. He'd rather me know everything and relay the information as needed, not go on and on about it before hand. It drives me crazy. I'll say "We need to leave by 2:00. Here are the directions, look them over while I get the kids ready." Even if he sits at my computer and looks at the map he'll act as though it's my fault if he doesn't remember. Because it wasn't interesting enough for him to pay attention to what he was looking at. It's a majority of men that are like this.

    Grinding in the car could also be a bad ball joint or a bad bearing. Make sure to get EVERYTHING checked. We had grinding and it turned out to be a bad ball joint.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:25 AM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • All men. I told my husband the same thing last year. Our rotars needed changed along with our brakes and I kept hearing a grinding sound and he thought I was nuts. His dad got in the truck and asked why we hadn't fixed the problem. he apologized while I got yo say "I told you so!" He doesn't question me on anything now :)

    Answer by amber1330 at 11:25 AM on Jan. 17, 2011