Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you tell? adult content

If your child or adoptive child was created from a rape would you tell them? Do you owe them the truth or is that just too much information? I was talking to my inlaws the other day about the topic( It just somehow came up) and they all said that they would never tell their child no matter what the age. Im not saying 10years old but maybe 20's or 30's. Would you tell your child or withhold that information? Do they have the right to know?

Answer Question

Asked by Steph319 at 5:40 PM on Jan. 17, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 21 (11,543 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • IF that were to happen I wouldn't want to tell them. IF they asked who their parent were I would just say we didn't know who your bio father was. If they pressed the issue I would tell them when they were old and mature enough.

    Answer by MamaWolf1981 at 5:42 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I would tell for sure, at what seemed age appropriate. Depending on maturity maybe 15-17ish. Of course those are some pretty intense years. I am not sure I'd wanna rock the boat too much .... but I wouldn't wanna be a liar either. Jeez that's a tough one, op.

    Answer by hibbingmom at 5:42 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I would ONLY tell them if they kept on and on. Also, they would have to be old enough and mature enough to handle it all.

    Answer by jdbrown21 at 5:43 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • Jeez that's a tough one, op

    I know! lol Thats why I havent answered my own ? yet. I have not clue what i would do. It would depend on a lot of diff things I guess. But at the same time a life is to be cherished and why should someone be ashamed of how they came about? Not sure. Just thinking out loud

    Comment by Steph319 (original poster) at 5:44 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • its is tough. If i think for myself if I happend becuase of a rape I dont think I wanna know that, because I would be mad a t my father but withouth this awful rape happening I woulndt be alive. So I think I wouldnt tell.

    Answer by LittleBirdFly at 5:45 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I would never tell.
    It doesn't matter how they were conceived, if you chose to keep them. All that matters is that you love them. I think telling them would create soooo many more problems for the person, rather than helping them by knowing.

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 5:58 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • I agree Mme.Langley. Its kind of like telling someone something thats only gonna hurt them but you did it to get it off your chest and set YOUR mind at ease. Not saying this is always the case but I can def put the two together in the same categorie

    Comment by Steph319 (original poster) at 6:01 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • They have a right to know. I will be telling my son when he is old enough to understand.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • honesty is the best policy even if it hard sooner or later the truth will be reveiled.

    Answer by Aries46845 at 8:35 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

  • No I would absolutely not tell them unless it was absolutely necessary.

    Answer by 4xsthetrouble at 11:29 PM on Jan. 17, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.