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What effort do you think should be put into working things out?

My ex (not the sperm donor) and I are trying to work things out. We were together for a year and a half and had a bad fight then broke up and he moved out. We only lived together for 2 mths. He wants to take things slow, which is fine. I didn't hear from him for a month after we broke up and lately he has been e-mailing me and finally called me last night and we kinda talked for 30 mins. Right now he has the advantage of talking to me when he wants and being there when he want's which is when my son is not there, having no responsibily in this and going home when he is done. I feel torn in half, like I have two different lives going on. I don't like having this secret life and keeping all of this on the side away from my son who misses him so much. I just need some advice, i've never done this working things out before and no other man has been in my son's life like this...


Asked by Anonymous at 1:11 PM on Nov. 13, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • Remember the old saying: "Why buy a cow when you can get all the milk you want for free"? If you are fulfilling all his needs without him fulfilling yours, then its a lopsided deal at best.
    Just be careful going in to this...and don't give him more than you can afford to lose of yourself.
    I think it's wise to move slowly, especially with regard to your son...who can be just as hurt as you are if things don't work out.

    Answer by companygoddess at 2:22 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • i would leave him if you feel that he is not that interested in seeing your son. i would want a man that loves mu son as well.

    Answer by melody77 at 1:19 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Tell him everything you just told us...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 1:24 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • (CON'T) MY REPLY ~ I want to tell him but I am afraid that if I do, it's going to show that I have no patience and that I am trying to rush him into something that he is trying to work his way back into. I don't know where I stand, we still arn't back together as a couple and that makes me more confused... :(

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:12 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Have you ever been unsure if you wanted to be with someone or not? Everyone knows whether they want to be with somone. Nobody needs time to figure it out. Either he wants to be in the relationship or he doesn't. If he isn't sure than there is a specific reason.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:00 PM on Nov. 13, 2008