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Am I wrong to ask of this?

BD & I have been arguing lately over ''rules'' of our kids while in our care. I say when our dd's are over at his house, he is to have NO overnight visitors, male OR female, NONE AT ALL! & honestly,...i wish I could say no female visitors too, but i know that won't happen. I don't like his choice of friends, and besides i'm scared they are going to try and be a ''mother'' to my kids! Not to mention, the girl he's seeing now, is his ex's friend, and his ex was my best friend, who he cheated on me with, that's exactly why i don't want my dd's around her, i don't trust either of them b*tch*s!!!!! (excuse my language! makes me mad thinking of her!)

anywho....is that acceptable to say? it goes for me as well, no overnight visitors will be staying while my kids are here. & they are not allowed to go anywhere besides family while at his house.....he has no license! so i dont want him & his little gf taking my dd's w/ them!!!!! maybe i'm over reacting,...i'm just scared ='(

 
knicole0708

Asked by knicole0708 at 12:34 PM on Jan. 18, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 23 (17,012 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • When I was pregnant with my son, his father left me for his current gf. They have been together since before my son was born. I dont like her, but she lives with his father. She knows I will break her face if she tries bein any type of mom to him and I made that very clear. Thats what you have to do. Make sure your BD's gf's know that you are the mother and you make the rules and if they dont want to follow you will do something about it. Put your foot down. My 14 month old son has been around his dad's gf all his life, but when he walks through that door when he comes back from visiting his dad, he knows who his mama is and I made sure of that. =)
    xmama_bellax

    Answer by xmama_bellax at 12:57 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • I can understand where you are coming from it makes sense. But I don't think that you can really ask that of him or dictate who the kids are around when in his care.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 12:38 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • I don't think you can dictate who is around the kids when they are in his custody. Your best bet would be to contact your lawyer and see if you can get that added to the custody agreement, but I don't know that you can.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 12:38 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • There is no custody agreement.....we haven't been to court yet.
    knicole0708

    Comment by knicole0708 (original poster) at 12:39 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • You can ask for no overnight guests in the court papers, but as far as where they can go during the day, I don't think there's anything you can do.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 12:49 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • It sounds like you are trying to control the situation. When you do go to court you can make any request that you would like as far as visitation goes but that does not mean you will get it.
    bcauseimthemom

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 12:56 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • I ask for no overnights because I know what will go on at night....if you know what I mean. we were together for four years, and he could care less if kids are present or not.
    knicole0708

    Comment by knicole0708 (original poster) at 12:57 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • I forgot to answer the question LOL

    Yes it is wrong, you shouldn't butt into your BD's life. You wouldn't want him doing it to you. But you should make sure his gf is afraid of getting her jaw broken lol
    xmama_bellax

    Answer by xmama_bellax at 12:58 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • He but's into mine ''/ thats the thing, he asks no overnight visitors at my house either!

    ...the thing is, they aren't even dating just seeing each other.....and they have only known each other for MAyBE 2 weeks now.......
    knicole0708

    Comment by knicole0708 (original poster) at 1:03 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

  • If you take it to court, they will say he can't have overnight visitors because that is inapropriate
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 3:28 PM on Jan. 18, 2011

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