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How do I convince my 34 yr son that he needs to get his stuff so he will have it when he gets his own place?.

This is what I asked last Summer: "Is there anything that I can do as a mom for my 33 yr who does not care about anything including himself?" I spent time with him doing things. When it came to Christmas I asked him to put some garland with lights along my railing and he did and asked me how it looked I told him it looked fine and after that he started to do more things around the house. When his wife has asked him to do things he had in the past but everytime he did she would get on his case because it he didn't do it to her satisfaction. But recently she served him divorce papers and wants him to get his stuff out of her place but he won't. So one of the times that she was still seeing him she had to actually bring all of his clothes over because he wouldn't take them he said that he didn't want them. Now I am trying to get him to get the rest of his stuff out but he says he doesn't care about it or want any of it. He hasn't called her lawyer because he says he doesn't know what to say. I told him that someday he is going to need all of it for his place but he says that he doesn't care . He has a tv and an entertainment center that they want out of their but he doesn't want it. When he got them he was very excited about them but his father in-law hated it and wanted it out. But my son seems to be delighted with the idea of leaving it in there because he says it pisses his father in-law off that its there. What are you suggestions?


Asked by mcarlson94 at 3:00 AM on Jan. 20, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 5 (83 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • I think you need to see if you can get him to talk to someone. He's in denial and may be depressed.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 1:04 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • I don't know if you can convince him of anything. You can only give him advise and hope he makes the best choices for him...not for anyone else. Sounds like this is a hard time for everyone. Maybe tell him what you might say if you were in his position when you called a lawyer.
    I don't know all the back ground but I know a long time ago I was in a bad relationship and he left me. I was so lost at the time I left and never looked back all I took with me was a carry on suitcase. I never got anything from that house. I have no regrets. They are just things. I am so happy now with a wonderful man and new things.
    Your Son will find the right person who will appreciate him for the little things he dose and he can do with out an entertainment center. Maybe it hurts him to think of going and getting it.

    Answer by sierramagic at 3:27 AM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Hi Sierramagic, thanks for your response it does sound sensible just very painful for me to watch him let go of the things that he loved.

    Comment by mcarlson94 (original poster) at 12:23 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • I hope it all works out for you. I think you can just be there for him and be understanding, even when it is hard to understand. Keep in mind that these are just things they are not that important. I hope I helped you just a little to feel a bit better. :)

    Answer by sierramagic at 4:09 PM on Jan. 20, 2011