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How do I decline this playdate?!

A friend of my sons from preschool, that I don't approve of, has asked for a play-date.
Now on the one hand we are going to be really busy and we are moving and cutting him from 5 days to 3 days, I am prego, there is also a religious difference as their family is hard core catholic and we are pagan.
But none of these seem like a good enough reason. I know you "can't" pick your child's friends but this boy is really rough, rude and manipulative. The grandma is use to getting what she wants and is VERY intimidating!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:03 PM on Jan. 20, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • "I'm sorry, it's just not going to work right now, we have a bunch of other stuff already scheduled for the next few weeks so we'd like to keep what down-time we have quiet and to ourselves. Maybe later on in the year, or this summer." Then you'll just have to figure out how to fend it off later on - but then you'll have the excuse of being farther along or having a new baby ;).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:25 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • um...just say "no"? You could just be honest and say "We're not doing playdates right now because honestly, we have too much going on." if she pushes you, just tell her that you don't think the boys get along that well and they need some time apart.
    charlottej

    Answer by charlottej at 1:08 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Tell them you want to put it off till after you are settled in more
    NicholeAT

    Answer by NicholeAT at 1:05 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Just say you aren't able to set one up at this time and will let her know if you decide you can do it. That way you aren't lying and you aren't being confrontational.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 1:06 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Nicholeat and if she offers to take him so we can unpack?
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:07 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • If you really don't wanna do the play date just say no. its no ones business what your reason behind it is. if they don'tlike it then tough. he is your son. i have a daughter who is 4 yrs old and an older girl(9) wanted to have a sleep over and i felt like you. i wasn't comfortable with it so i just kept saying maybe another time. they finally got the hint and never asked again.

    Christieluv0614

    Answer by Christieluv0614 at 1:09 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Ok the boys like each other, I just don't like what her boy teaches mine. I am not trying to be difficult I just want ALL my basis covered!!! This woman is really pushy and I don't want to be rude!!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:11 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Difficult to deal with pushy grandma, isn't it!? Wonder where her grandson is getting his poor behavior??? Since you don't want to be rude and it's an uncomfortable situation, you can create the excuses and maybe she'll give up. OR you could take advantage of that child's poor behavior and use it as a learning experience. What I mean is stay close by, correct the behaviors and teach your son to verbally stand up to the other child. Having your son say things like, "Don't hit me, I don't like that." Since difficult children are all around, it's good to use the time to empower your child. After one play date, if there is just too much intervening and "grandma" sees it, you could say that you'd like to wait until the boys are a little older and try again. Hopefully she'll move on!
    AlisonAstair

    Answer by AlisonAstair at 9:03 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

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