Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

need some advise

i am a swim insructor so when i get done with work i take a shower and change and walk home(i live across the street so it doesnt take long to get home). If i take longer than twenty min to get home then my bf starts getting mad. I have to rush alot to get home that quick and i think that i can get showered and changed and home in twenty min is pretty good. What should i do? Should i keep rushing or should i just take my time and prob end up fighting when i get home?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:42 PM on Jan. 20, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • Why is he timing you?
    NicholeAT

    Answer by NicholeAT at 4:44 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • yes, why is he controlling you this way? I'd sit him down and tell him you don't appreciate this and you're going to take as long as it takes and he should respect that.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 4:46 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • he says he missed me but i think he is worried i will cheat or something stupid like that
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:47 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Sorry, but when I hear the control freak come out, I begin to think of an abuser. It starts w/ controlling your every move & who you spend time with. If you start to notice other things, then start making your escape plan. Good luck!
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 4:47 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • wow, he's controlling, he needs to change or you need to leave, it will get worse. Let it be known it's not okay.
    DomoniqueWS

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 4:49 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • Controlling and insecure for sure. I wouldn't and couldn't live like that. GL

    zbee

    Answer by zbee at 4:52 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • I think your bf is out of line he has no right to get mad at you for taking your time. You have the right to take as much time as you need to shower, change and get home. Frankly this behavior of his sets of a 'red flag' (having to be in control and things to go his way). I would tell him that he needs to back off and stop timing you that you will take as long as you want. If he keeps it up or keeps getting mad, then it might be time to dump him.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 4:53 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • tell him to grow up. sounds like he's obsessed being posessive and a total controler. maybe he's trying to pick fights. or he's doing it for spite. don't know him, wouldn't want to. sounds like ur in a relationship that isn't good. bad company run as fast as u can and don't look back!
    diamondsarecool

    Answer by diamondsarecool at 4:55 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • That is the way my husband used to be with me....like he didnt trust me. It is a type of control for him and i think it is wrong. I used to rush to get home also, but then i had a talk with him and let him know how i was feeling and asked why he did this. He explained to me it was because his first wife cheated on him. I told him im not his first wife and he needs to learn to trust again. I would NOT rush home, it is his problem and he needs to understand how you are feeling. I agree with Domonique that it will only get worse and to let him know its not ok.
    team21

    Answer by team21 at 4:56 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

  • i think he is crazy, your just across the street and his excuse is lame. red flag begining of a controler
    prettymamiof2

    Answer by prettymamiof2 at 5:21 PM on Jan. 20, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.