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adoption of a teenager

So my Dh and and I are thinking about adopting my niece ? she is 16 years old she is a beautiful girl with alot of bf. and she is sexually active , and has alot of medical problems that my sister doesn't want to deal with .Her mother tells her everyday  how worthless she is  and she pretty much raised her brother and sister .she puts food on the tabe for them baths  them put them to bed  . we think she needs a break from that life she's been doing it since she was 10 ,  She puts her down every chance she get and i hate watching it . I guess my question is would you do it ? this is her picture

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mommyfitzgerald

Asked by mommyfitzgerald at 2:48 PM on Jan. 21, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 5 (100 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Just have her move in with you. I did the same with a niece.

    Also ask her what she would want.
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 2:51 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • I think you should weigh the pros and cons carefully. If you have children you don't want her being an influence on ( not the greatest example for them ect.) you shouldn't do it. Your kids should come first. However, she shouldn't be with her mom if the woman treats her like that. I would take her in, but have plenty of rules for her ( No sex while you are living in my house, watch your language, so on....) If she is as sweet as she seems she should be happy to be rescued from her situation.
    Robbiesmommy83

    Answer by Robbiesmommy83 at 2:53 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • I agree, just ask her how she feels with moving in with you.
    arenad

    Answer by arenad at 2:54 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • she does want to live with us , and i have told her my rules of no sex . her and my opldest daughter are really close and they talk every day and she tells her stuff like i wish i would have waited for stuff like sex and fooling around with boys i think it would work out but just wanted to hear what others thought about it
    mommyfitzgerald

    Comment by mommyfitzgerald (original poster) at 2:56 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • I would do anything I could to help out my niece. The thing that you and she must be clear about is if you adopt her then your sister and her siblings will be legal strangers. Her mother and fathers name will be stricken from her birth certificate and a new one will be issued stating you and your husband are her parents. Make sure you're all ok with that.
    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 3:42 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • It's hard because there are other kids in the house and would they feel if you took her and not them? If it was just her, I'd say do it now, absolutely. But with other kids involved, it's tricky. They all deserve a chance at happiness and having someone love them unconditionally.
    derosia_mama

    Answer by derosia_mama at 9:35 PM on Jan. 22, 2011

  • having her move in seems like it might be a really positive thing for the family and the niece. It may be one of those moments that will change her life for the better.
    Aries46845

    Answer by Aries46845 at 7:06 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

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