Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Did you use the "cry it out" method or did you immediately soothe your child?

I have heard alot about the cry it out method. I think that its stupid but that's just me. It states that you are to leave a newborn so that they can learn self soothing.... Also it can lead to the child being spoiled.

When can a kid get spoiled if not as a newborn?

Did you allow your child to self soothe or did you spoil them? I spoiled mine.

Answer Question

Asked by 35yoamom at 9:50 PM on Jan. 21, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 20 (10,016 Credits)
Answers (28)
  • I spoiled mine until i felt he was old enough to soothe himself. Which I didn't feel thatway until 3 months (after the S.I.D period)

    Answer by usdragonflies at 9:51 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • well, maybe you need to actually read up on the CIO method...the RIGHT WAY to do it. it has nothing to do with letting a NEWBORN cry

    Answer by armywife43 at 9:52 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • When dd was a newborn I spoiled her but now that she is almost 2 I let her cry it out if she gets a boo boo or is throwing a tantrum.

    Answer by sweetpea1217 at 9:54 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • When my child was a newborn I fed him when he cried, because that's what he wanted... As he got older I did the cry it out method because sometimes he'd be dry, full, and just too tired to let go. He'd cry for 15 minutes, then I'd go in and calm him, give him his binki he had undoubtedly thrown, re-wrap him in his blanket, maybe sing a song, then leave again and re-set the timer for 15 minutes. I never had to reset the timer more then twice ever and usually after the first cycle he went to sleep.

    Answer by ba13ygrl1987 at 9:55 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • I have to agree w/armywife the cry it out method isn't just letting your newborn cry, thats ridiculous...I gave my son all the love he needed as a newborn, but I didn't spoil him too much b/c I didn't want him to be so attached, that he was afraid to leave my side...hes 5 now, and hes just perfect.

    Answer by mslh84 at 9:55 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • I guess I spoiled at times, but at certain times I let my kids learn how to fuss and get themselves settled. I didn't always run in when they were in bed and cried, or when they got up in the morning or nap, then they played for a while. It all depends on when your doing the spoiling I guess. I do know I felt like I was always kissing my new born babies, and wondered if it was too much, so much so I asked my Dr. and he said it was OK to always kiss and talk to your baby. How can you not hold and kiss a new born baby, it's just the most wonderful feeling in the world. Now I'm not sure if I even answered your question properly.

    Answer by MyAngel003 at 9:55 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • Babies can start to self soothe at 4 months, they start to connect the dots at that point, and yes you can spoil at 4 month old. Before that, they don't understand and are still forming bonds. I was lucky with my son, he started sttn at 5 months so I didn't have to worry about it. With my dd however, she is 17 months and I am afraid to let her self soothe for fear she will wake up my 3 y/o......

    Answer by BabyBugsmama at 9:56 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • I only CIO when their cries sound like "I'm tired, and I think I'm totally not."

    Answer by LizardAgent at 9:58 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • My mother in law ranted and raved about how I was going to "spoil" my newborns by not doing the cry it out method.  I listened to her with my first born because I had never been around babies period and I wasn't going to be so "know it all".  I tried it for a while but everytime he cried, I cried.  I couldn't stand to hear him cry.  With my 2nd child, I picked her up whenever I felt like it, disregarding everything my mother in law said, and she was the most content baby I've ever seen.  She didn't cry and always seemed very happy.  With my 3rd I did the same thing.  I cuddled damnit.  She was laughing out loud at 3 months.  She wasn't "content" unless one of us was holding her but she was extremely happy.  Now I am on my 4th child and I will be cuddling again!


    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 9:58 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

  • i loved to hold my babies. i waould get told i was spoiling them but i dont think you can spoil a child with love. HOWEVER, if mommy was really frazzled and felt like i needed a mommy time out cuz baby jsut owuld not stop crying even after i have tried everything then they would go to their crib or playpen and mommy owuld take a breather.

    Answer by sweetestkitten at 9:59 PM on Jan. 21, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.