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How do i get my daughters dad to want to be involved with her?

He pays child support but just doesnt see her. he doesnt not like her or not want to be her dad. And on more than one occasion he said he's nervous and would like to wait till he gets his own place so his overbearing mother isn't around He's 19 what do i do?

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Asked by Yngmomma17 at 8:40 PM on Nov. 13, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (6)
  • i can't make him do anything so you'll have to be patient. it sucks when they don't see the value in it for the childs sake. is she just a baby?

    Answer by melody77 at 8:48 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • You wait until he's ready. If you push him he will resent it and may take it out on her and not see her anymore.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:16 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • my sons father is also supposed to be paying child support to for three yrs now and he has all rights to him but he used to call and say and he would pick him up and i would tell my son and he would never show so and even his family would call for him so he can go over and i would take him across town and then 30 min later they would call to pick him up cuz they were going some where then last yr in June his dad got married to the other baby momma and then it was like my son wasnt there anymore and they havent called or checked on him since July of 07 and my son doesnt ask for them and he is much happier with me and my SO. So if he doesnt want to see her i wouldnt force it and if your dd is happy without him just let it go. Sorry maybe rude but its reality. GOOD LUCK hope its not how mine went.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:31 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • You can't MAKE him. I've been divorced for 10 years and I have given up on wanting my ex to care about his kids. At this point, I'd be happy if he just left them alone. One's going on 20 and in the army, one is going on 17, and the youngest one is 13 and severely disabled and doesn't know him from a stranger. My kids are better off without him at this point. He is paying support finally, after years of dragging him kicking and screaming to court.

    Raise your daughter yourself. If he doesn't love her now, why do you want to force him? I wouldn't trust him.

    Answer by KayLeyWade at 10:41 PM on Nov. 13, 2008

  • Don't force him but give him updates on the baby and let him know everything the baby is doing. My baby's dad at first was like that until I gave him his space and then he said he couldn't stop thinking about our daughter. I would show him pictures and then when she started calling him dada he got teary eyed and hasn't left since. It's really ahrd on guys especially when there young my boyfriend/baby'sdad was only 19 when I had our daughter and he was barely an adult but once he realizes that being a daddy is the best thing in the world he'll regret his separation. Let him know that u support his life (going to college, working) as long as he's in the baby's life. If he doesn't do anyt of these things don't rule out moving on and giving your baby that father figuere because it's importnant

    Answer by babyangelromero at 6:20 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Also he could be getting some pressure from his mom so make plans to see him and bring the baby maybe to the park also bring up similarities between them like some of the same habits like smiling or if your daughter has his nose point it out to him so he can be a little more accepting. If moving is what's going to encourage him to see his daughter than help him find a place. Make sure that if u guys aren't on good terms that u strictly keep this about his daughter and not bring up anything about u guys up or the past or what could have hurt or ended ur relationship. Mommy's and daddy's break up not Daddy's and children. Good luck!

    Answer by babyangelromero at 6:25 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

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